Beware the Sax Solo

Albums of the Year 2011

2011-12-21T12:22:00.000-08:00

The first thing I notice about this list it felt like effort. Not because I didn't like any of these albums, but because my 2011 purchases have been minimal and after the Top 5, numbers 6-10 was difficult to choose from what was left. Despite this year's purchased collection of older music, I've bought 15 albums from this year. I've listened to a few more on Spotify, but I've been far from my usual keen self for music.

The second thing I notice is my last blog entry here was the Top 10 Albums of 2010. This disappoints me as I love writing, and have been told by a good friend I'm far better at it then I think. It does surprise me that I have offered nothing to the blogosphere, but this is no different to my art output this year. I've simply been distracted by work, exams and trying to have some sort of social life. This will change next year, but I'll change the way I blog, I expect. Possibly a new blog as BTSS seems to represent a younger, less wittier me, so this may well be my last blog here, so enjoy.

10) ANTHRAX - Worship Music (Nuclear Blast)

It's been ten years since Anthrax released their last studio album of brand-new material, and considering the vocalist soap opera in that time, it feels like a miracle that Worship Music ever got made. In the end, 80s frontman Joey Belladonna sorted the vocals out for an album that sits firmly with other great Anthrax records. The familiar stomp of Earth on Hell sits happily alongside the great choruses of The Devil You Know and Fight 'Em Til You Can't. However, it's the slow-burning triumph of In The End that shines this album's light. You can indeed keep your faith in Metal based on this.

Fight 'em Til You Can't

9) MIRRORS - Lights and Offerings (Pure Groove)

This Brighton four-piece named themselves quite appropriately. Throughout this debut, it feels like all four synths are constantly reflecting and amplifying each other. A sense of identity is still being searched for amongst the familiar Kraft-League-OMD-isms, but writing good songs is one hurdle they have leapt with ease. Textured soundscapes underpin the flow Fear of Drowning and Ways to an End. Look At Me and Hide and Seek throw up the necessary chorus while Searching the Wilderness and Write Through the Night show they can master different tempos with confidence. A sparkling debut.

Look at Me

8) OPETH - Heritage (Roadrunner)

The surprising thing about this album was how much it surprised a lot of Opeth fans. Compared to their previous offerings, Heritage is pretty much a full-on Prog odyssey, albeit one with Metal guitars. Considering the scope of previous albums like Still Life and Ghost Reveries, Heritage's bouts of indulgence isn't surprising at all. However, Opeth realise that their strength is still complex metallicisms, hence the likes of Folklore and Slither. But in truth, tracks like Nepenth and I Fell the Dark are no different to the more restrained tracks of their past that dotted past efforts. The fact that one album is full of them should be commended.

The Devil's Orchard

7) WHITE LIES - Ritual (Polydor)

The Joy Division comparisons are probably never going to disappear unless the Ealing trio go all pop-punk on us, so they may as well just carry on with improving the songwriting. Debut To Lose My Life... was good and showcased a handful of classic tracks, and Ritual thankfully has more of them. In Love and Turn the Bells represent a better approach to their mellow introspection but it's when the really let rip that they prove they're a band in the own right. Stranger and Bad Love shine an epic shadow and light respectively, while Holy Ghost storms through at a comparatively frenetic pace to a storming climax.

Holy Ghost

6) AND ONE - Tanzomat (Machinery)

Knowing your strengths is the first key to success in this business, and Berlin's And One certainly know theirs. For fifteen years, they've been very good at being the world's best Depeche Mode tribute band, despite the fact that Basildon's finest changed yearly from 1981. Tanzomat's 2006 predecessor Bodypop rooted itself deep in Depeche's 1983 sound, which seems fair considering Depeche recorded much of their 80s output in Berlin, and Tanzomat follows much the same route. Bodypop's strength was its contribution of the best synthpop tracks Depeche never wrote and Tanzomat has a fair old whack at the same title. It's not quite there, but it passes the exam by a long shot. The hook of Shining Star compliments the slow baroque of Playing Dead but it's the otherworldly throb of The Aim is in Your Head that raises this album's bar alone.

Save the Hate

5) FEIST - Metals (Polydor)

An album title that raised my hopes that Leslie Feist had done a Dave Grohl and recruited Metal's finest into her fold. Not so, although she is covering Mastodon for their split-EP next year. However, Metals abandons the Indie whimsy of 2007's The Reminder and takes its cue from the Chain Gang songs of the Deep South. The likes of Caught a Long Wind and Comfort Me stand head-to-head with any great Blues track of the last 80 years, while How Come you Never go There and The Circle Married the Line lends a welcome sense of familiarity to the proceedings.

Comfort Me

4) LADYTRON - Gravity the Seducer (Nettwork)

The annoying thing about Ladytron is they make this lark sound too easy. Hip digi-electro coolness? Check the first 2 albums 604 and Light & Magic. Melding cool synths with wistful gothic impulse? Hello 2005's Witching Hour. Synth-pop that uses the biggest beats and the deepest bass? Gotta be 2008's Velocifero and this writer's Album of that Year. So what next? Unsurprisingly, Liverpool/Scotland/Bulgaria's finest opted to chill out a bit, as Gravity the Seducer happily drifts the electronic ether. White Elephant and Ambulances prove the notion that 'beats' are not the be-all and end-all of good music, while White Gold and Moon Palace throw up some sinister restraint. One of 2011's more stark and beautiful albums.

Mirage

3) COLD CAVE - Cherish the Light Years (Matador)

2009's debut Love Comes Close was an assured and intriguing tribute to New Wave's slightly more pretentious artists. There were some great sounds, but too much introspection and experimentation seemed to get in the way of creating some great tracks. And it appears someone told them so afterwards as the 'difficult second album' is anything but. Hurtling in with some unexpected post-punk guitars colliding with some classic synth, The Great Pan is Dead waves its songwriting flag high up before smacking you hard with a killer chorus. From then on, Cherish the Light Years sways and lurches, while all the time, a guitar lines hug synthesizer hooks like the best mates they are. Stand-out track Icons of Summer proves that they can do 'the build-up' as well, while ending single Villains of the Moon is one of 2011's great pop songs. If there's a criticism, it's that the 80s influences are pretty obvious, and it sometimes feels like a New Order tribute album. Luckily, the tracks are that good.

Villians of the Moon

2) MACHINE HEAD - Unto the Locust (Roadrunner)

Ten years ago, Robb's boys didn't paint a pretty picture. Their fourth effort Supercharger seemed to quite happily throw its lot in with the commercial Nu-Metal crowd, to unpleasant results. Realising that their strength was, quite simply, Metal, they quickly found the right path and have increased in muscular Metal beauty since. If you thought 2007's The Blackening was a career-definer, then this follow-up will make you seriously rethink things. Unto the Locust takes all the strengths of The Blackening and distills them into seven massive tracks that lay to waste any claim that seething Metal can't be 'accessible'. Be Still and Know's triumphant chorus would ensure Number One status in some Metal-Friendly Scandinavian countries. This is the End pays homage to both Metallica and Maiden without stealing wholesale while Who We Are borrows the local kindergarten choir to scary effect. All that, plus it would fit on a 45-minute-long cassette side, and that's the best compliment. Metal Album of the Year.

Locust

1) LYKKE LI - Wounded Rhymes (Atlantic)

If you had heard Lykke's stripped-down poppy debut Youth Novels, then her sophomore effort may very well had scared the bejeezus out of you. The degree to which she clambered into her own soul and unearthed something quite different is astounding, and Wounded Rhymes frequently astounds. There certainly appears to be almost no instrument that hasn't been used in concocting this stellar album and it wouldn't surprise me to know that steel drum sound was in fact the kitchen sink being hammered.

Youth Knows No Pain kicks off with it's Hammond-Organ hippy riff and rides a classic 'come on' chorus. I Follow Rivers continues the pace before Love out of Lust wists through and steam-cleans the vibes of before. Unrequited Love and I Know Places offer much the same sense of creeping caution, the former as if the Ronettes covered the great Blues artists and the latter a simple strum in the park. But as hinted, the dark overtures rear their head very often with the likes of Rich Kids Blues and Jerome blending typical pop accessibility with an overwhelming sense of introversion. The album's 'low'light, however, is Sadness is a Blessing, the most tearfully intense track you're likely to hear all year, its 'Be My Baby' drumbeat ready to make the hardest of males burst into tears.

The best compliment I can give this album is that it is frequently indescribable. I hope you have as much difficulty. Utterly brilliant.

I Follow Rivers

Albums of the Year 2010

2011-01-02T10:00:00.000-08:00

10) JIMMY EAT WORLD - Invented (DGC)

Following up one of the "Albums of the Year" is going to be problematic, unless you're Jimmy Eat World, where every album holds that particular accolade, leaving the job in hand a simple one: Make another bloody great album. Oh, and what do you know...? As usual, the Arizona songsmiths have avoided the same approach as last time round, this instance being when 2007's Chase This Light sounded like the most uplifting and carefree thing in the world. Traces of that and past vitriols still shine through their crisply-layered guitar melodies, but it's the epic introspection of the title track, Stop and the truly majestic Cut that give Invented its own identity to sit beautifully alongside past glories.

My Best Theory

9) LOSTPROPHETS - The Betrayed (Visible Noise)

Ten years ago, Lostprophets were cited as being the band to outlast their shouty nu-metal peers and manage a couple more albums. Four albums and more Top Ten appearances later, they show no signs of stopping. After a couple of albums of working on both their riffs and their pop nous under the guidance of some big-name producers, the Pontypridd lads have taken everything in stride and done it all themselves, lock stock and production. And it's no surprise that The Betrayed feels 100% like a Lostprophets album, just like the classic debut. What they have now is better choruses (Where We Belong, Dirty Little Heart) and better riffs (Dstryr/Dstryr, Next Stop,Atro City). They may well have certainly sounded arrogant back in the day, but they deserve their "told you so"s now.

Where We Belong

8) VOLBEAT - Beyond Hell, Above Heaven (Universal)

Quiffs + "ELVIS" tattoos + harmonicas = Rock 'n' Roll. It's one of the great universal equations. If there's no Quiff, it's not Rock 'n' Roll, it's that simple. Denmark's Volbeat have quiffs and "ELVIS" tattoos, strangely enough. They also have a wonderful approach to effortlessly fusing together old-fashioned Rockabilly with old-fashioned anthemic Heavy Metal on the likes of the fist-pumping Fallen, the slide-guitar tinged 7 Shots and the pure rockabilly of 16 Dollars. Yes, the subject matter can be as dark as it is light, but the spirit of the record is overwhelmingly triumphant.

Fallen

7) DEVIL SOLD HIS SOUL - Blessed & Cursed (Century Media)

The key to heavy music's evolution has never been about how brutal a band can make the riffs, but in what can be added to said brutality. Devil Sold His Soul's approach is to couple and underpin their epic, richly layered wall of guitars with such serene beauty. They make the difference between solid and epic and prove that heavy music is just as much music as anything else. Strip away the loud guitars and the core melody of within Drowning/Sinking and An Ocean of Lights could sit alongside any classical opus. The fact that DSHS are still quite young is a testament to their abilities.

Callous Heart

6) SLEIGH BELLS - Treats (Mom and Pop)

It's always worth approaching with caution any new act that has almost every blogger and hip music media outlet salivating, especially when comprised of the male/female duo, a formation also guaranteed to generate lazy comparisons that won't always hold water. You see, Sleigh Bells don't sound like any other duo/band/group/combo. They do, however, sound like the High School Marching Band following a sadomasochistic orgy with the Cheerleaders in the band room, and the likes of Tell 'Em, Crown on the Ground and A/B Machines are the catchy stains that won't wash off the guitars or keyboards.

Infinity Guitars

5) FREEZEPOP - Imaginary Friends (archenemy)

Despite synthpop's firm grasp of the catchy chorus during its original early-80s heyday, it still, for the most part, retained that icy, gloomy exterior. Nowadays, it seems that every band revelling in this glorious era are focusing on the colourful optimism that could be found in a select few bands. Freezepop represent this magnificently, with their fourth album breaking off the cautious shackles of previous effort Future Future Future Perfect and just dropping hook after hook with scant regard for your earworm tolerance. Choruses? Freezepop have abducted the definition of the chorus and locked it inside their keytars. Lose That Boy, Magnetic and the title track perfectly recall an era when pop music sounded as if it was offered up by intergalactic alien cyborgs as opposed to rusty robots from the Cowell Corporation production line.

Magnetic

4) IRON MAIDEN - The Final Frontier (EMI)

Thirty years after their debut album, and Iron Maiden entered the UK album chart at Number One with this, their 15th effort. That in itself tells you all about this extraordinary band and their devoted fan base. It also tells that you that, unlike their peers from that era, Maiden will never stagnate, will always try something they haven't before, and will never make an album that sounds like their previous one. Oh, granted, they know what they're good at, but they'll always keep you guessing. As such, The Final Frontier moves away from the bombastic grit of A Matter of Life and Death and, like its sci-fi baiting title suggests, travels down a more space-age highway. The likes of El Dorado and the almost balladic Coming Home positively soar, but it's Isle of Avalon and Starblind that really shine. The former rides a gentle guitar line before a massive chorus takes off through an epic prog bank that Rush would be proud of, while the latter provides the almost-orchestral soundtrack to being stranded on some desolate planet in tandem with some alien riff. Proof that Iron Maiden will continue to live long and prosper.

The Final Frontier

3) THE DILLINGER ESCAPE PLAN - Option Paralysis (Season of Mist)

Option Paralysis is a fairly inappropriate album title - there's absolutely nothing paralytic about this monster. Dillinger continue to rip through any straightjacket with violent abandon, twisting and spasming in every conceivable way possible. Blast beats stop-start with stuttering hammerhead guitars while Greg Puciato's vocals lurch from hellhound shrieking to lounging cabaret. This is no un-easy listening classic, though. DEP continue to suggest that if they were left alone to write a pop album, they bloody well could. Sure, the tuneful aspects of Farewell, Mona Lisa and Endless Endings are tempered by tracks such as Chinese Whispers, a mainstream rock song masquerading as a psychpathic loon, and Widower, which veers from a piano-led croon into a climax of epic proportions. It's also one of the best tracks you'll hear all year.

Farewell, Mona Lisa

2) KYLESA - Spiral Shadow (Season of Mist)

The key to great Metal bludgeon is not always in the actual riff itself, but what surrounds it. The bands that perfect the dynamics and diversity within their sound are those that become legends and from here on, Kylesa could well join those ranks. Their Georgia, US background explains their assured take on the Southern-flavoured doomy sludge-metal that they've made their own on the previous four releases. What Spiral Shadow does is focus on those more atmospheric and melodic moments they'd merely visited in the past, making the likes of Cheating Synergy and Forsaken such an addictive proposition. While other bands try to be too clever with their time-signatures, Kylesa recognise that it isn't always appropriate, and sometimes something as basic as speeding up or slowing down works just as well when need be. They joy of this album is highlighted by the midway-twofer of Crowded Road, wherein the dual-drumming is complimented by several monolithic hooks and a line pilfered from Egyptian Folklore, followed by Don't Look Back, which could be the most twisted accessible Pixies track ever written. If Mastodon decided to give up their crown, Kylesa would be more then deserved successors.

Tired Climb

1) CRYSTAL CASTLES - II (Polydor)

Great art isn't about just reaching into the soul of the person experiencing it, it's about lifting it up and transporting it elsewhere, placing it firmly in another town, another world, another dimension. But the artist has to THAT good, THAT assured of their craft. Crystal Castles' self-titled debut released two years previously filtered through a glut of electronic sounds pilfered from knackered samplers and video game arcade sound-cards and proceeded to astound fans and journalists alike. What this second effort does is lose some of that carefree abandon and focuses on the atmosphere that they occasionally touched on beforehand. Celestica and Baptism may sound like standard rave fare initially, but they begin to unravel into something far more soulful than the average HedKandi number. Doe Deer collides a hardcore punk drumbeat with a demented siren call while Birds violently pulses on the back of a classic electro rhythm. Empathy and Violent Dreams lose themselves in a concentrated mass of vocoded breaths and samples. The album's highlights come in Year of Silence, which lifts a vocal off one of Sigur Ros's more jaunty numbers and morphs it into the basis of a form of dark hypnosis, while Vietnam singlehandedly combines everything that they've done so far into five minutes of glorious wonder.

Speculating over what the next album will sound like is nothing short of pointless. It wouldn't be beyond an unrealistic realm to suggest they ditch all their equipment and go down a more aggressive punk route and still sound just as otherworldly. What we do know is that Ethan and Alice are one of the world's "perfect couples" when it comes to memorable music. Here's
to another self-titled album.

Not in Love (feat. Robert Smith

The Spotted Ant #4

2010-04-20T13:37:00.000-07:00

Waaaaaaay overdue, I know. I've been no busier than normal, but there has been a lengthy PC-tidy-up of late so I just never got round to it even though I put it together a while back.

I'll summarise the goods this time round: Top new tunes from Goldfrapp, New Young Pony Club and White Wizzard; Some classics from Judas Priest, Soft Cell and Robyn; the token cover is Carter USM's take on immortal Pet Shop Boys, and a fantastic remix of an already top Metric track.

Carry On!

The Battle of Trafalgar. Series 2.

2010-03-22T14:05:00.000-07:00

Rain, they said, and they were right. I may have avoided the rain if I had left when intended, but it didn't happen. Half an hour behind schedule and the intended forecast rang true. The umbrella helped, but the Reebok trainers, bought on impulse from an Oxford Street "Sports Direct" for eighteen quid three years before for the purpose of gym exercise, were a bit ragged and prone to leakage. Richard was waiting at the station, just as one useful train was pulling away. Not a problem, the intended one should still get us to The Big Smoke in time. Even when three minutes late.

It occurred to me on the train that mentioning "ninja stars" and "the full Arnie" may have had some of the more conservative types lucky enough to be sitting down, sending frantic text messages to a useful 999 text service. As it was, we were beneath their notice, being the bequiffed and bearded oiks that we were. Lord knows what the twenty-something yuppies thought as they munched on their prawn sandwiches, gleefully looking forward to the yacht roadshow in Putney. Fuck 'em.

As it was, we arrived on my estimated schedule and the three-stop trip underground would get us to our destination well on time. But I'm a creature of habit, and I headed straight to the wrong line, with my trusting friend putting his ill-advised faith in my normally assured route-making. One stop later at the Green Park, and my error hit me. It was fine, an exit and quick jog would still result in punctuality. And it did, thank goodness, but my pride took an embarrassing hit.

With the rain now stopped, we mingled amongst our fellow brethren. The standard attire was there - camo gear, hoodies, band tee shirts, daft sunglasses, a viking helmet, a skimpy Christmas dress on some bloke. This all paled into comparison when I noticed the man on the ledge. This was not the day for a sermon. It wasn't right. I felt like warning him, but he made his choice. He would have to live with it.

Photo - Alexander Dick

Then he arrived, our very own Cyrus. His name to most was Stuart, sometimes Mike, but Cyrus seemed appropriate when considering his success at bringing us all together...and with his upcoming demise. He made his speech, everyone was rapt, and then...the wave of noise. The second Battle of Trafalgar.

It was glorious. The might of an army, with one sole aim. No weapon was spared, guns, grenades, throwing knives, AK47s, flamethrowers, The Force. The lot.

Photo: Mark Richardson

No one was spared.

Photo - Tom Jones

Photo - Tom Jones

By the end...devastation.

Photo - Becky Sadler

I wondered how it looked to those around who could just stand and watch, powerless, except to note its place in history. Especially when I realised my demise was captured, after a brave and staggering last stand with red rucksack still intact, as I met the eyes of the soldier with the red mane, and we finished it once and for all. At 25 seconds to be precise:

Up close, I can only imagine the horror...

But this is nothing new. Some have seen it all before. They know when help is beyond the injured and barren...

Photo: Mark Richardson

It as the end, and I especially felt for the one who fell in the water, the water you don't go anywhere near. But ultimately, I felt for myself as I lay in agony, having landed on the ninja stars I bloody well forgot to use...

Everyone then regenerated and went to the pub. Or shopping. I bought Secret Wars toys. Woop!

NOTE: I've borrowed some photos and Youtube vids, and they're credited where possible. Thanks for it, but if you don't want me to us them, let me know. There's plenty more vids on Youtube. Go see.

A big thanks to Stuart, who organised it, with more big thanks to Simon, Nick, Edgar, Jessica and Mark. Couldn't have done it without you.

The Spotted Ant #3

2010-02-25T13:41:00.000-08:00

It's that time of the month, folks. Well, that time again anyway. As I can't guarantee one every fortnight, I've realised that two a month is certainly do-able. No excuse not to.

Highlights? All of it, really, but Lamb of God, Nitzer Ebb and Depeche Mode get an inclusion for some top live shows this month, as do Between the Buried and Me, who also supply the SA's token cover version. Some classics from Accept, The Distillers and The Beloved. Add some great new tracks from Beach House, Massive Attack and The Dillinger Escape Plan and 'tis really an awesome show.

Look, I've even done a crappy poster for it!

Yes Sir, I can boogie!

Album Review: HADOUKEN! - For The Masses (EMI)

2010-02-09T10:18:00.000-08:00

Brave move, that album title. Evidently, there's something for everyone within this opus, unlike the riot that was their debut Music for an Accelerated Culture - a rabid mix of rave, grime, rock, rap, digi-synth pop, more rave etc - that likely had anyone over the age of thirty running a mile. A Technicolour attack of all the most exciting bits of electronic music from the last three decades, and with all the songwriting nous to apply it to. If anyone had enough in the armoury to burn the tag line "difficult second album", it's this lot.

Things certainly start off well enough on opener Rebirth, including an opening segment that wouldn't be out of place on a Sisters of Mercy album! This bodes well as a sign that the band are continuing to evolve, but the album slowly reveals that this isn't the case. The band do sound bigger, bolder, more confident, but they appear to have lost that vibrancy and excitement that made the first album such a rush to listen to. It feels like the band are recognising the need to "mature"and not playing to their strengths in doing so. While the '90s-rave-inspired beat and lyrical method change slightly on each track, the dynamics does not. Tracks such as Turn The Lights Out and Mic Check contain their own build-ups and path to a killer climax, but they don't happen. It's as the album continues that you realise the biggest crime is a lack of hooks and memorable choruses. Evil does do the latter but the rest of the track suffers from the sins mentioned earlier.

It's only towards the end of the album that things take an obvious turn for the better. Bombshock serves up a molotov mix of aggressive rapping, grimy guitars and a core drum loop that reassures you that they can still do what they do best, but it also feels like the track's superiority is exaggerated by what came before. Play The Night manages to combine all their good points to an epic feel while closer Lost is a lesson in how to do atmospheric rave. It's reassuring, but as far as the album is concerned, a bit too late.

There's no denying that Hadouken! are growing up and evolving - an obvious sign is that most tracks don't seem to be inspired by a different episode of "Skins", but it does seem to have come with a price. No-one wants a repeat of the first album, especially if you're closer to 30 than 20, but the core strengths of that killer debut seem to have been forgotten. The third album will certainly be the decider.

5/10

The Spotted Ant #2

2010-02-08T10:36:00.000-08:00

Yup, I'm keeping this up, although I still owe this blog a couple of album reviews. A week off should allow this. He says confidently before life happens.

The second Spotify playlist I've knocked up has a bit of a birthday feel to it as I hit the big 3-0 this week. Sadly, I couldn't find the theme to "Thirtysomething" on it otheriwse I would've added it for comic/ridiculous effect. Most artists this time are those I've seen on or around birthdays in past years. At The Drive-In's presence represents a rather memorable 21st in which me and my friends got rather drunk and met forgotten chart-rockers The Dum Dums outside the venue. Messy night, and At The Drive In's last, if I remember. Lostprophets, as well as being personal favourites, always seem to tour around this time of year for a new album, which is handy. I saw Municipal Waste last week. They fucked me up.

Elsewhere, Terrorvision's cover of Dave Clark Five's Glad All Over is a tribute to Crystal Palace FC's inspired "fuck you" to their penalised entry into administration. They may even get near the play-offs again at this rate. Special AKA's live version of Too Much Too Young was number one when I was born. If ever there was a sign of having credible music taste for life, that was it. Current faves from Hot Chip, Pnau and Fan Death are also present.

Enjoy

3 COLOURS RED - Paralyse
HOT CHIP - One Life Stand
SPECIAL AKA - Too Much Too Young (live)
LOSTPROPHETS - Five is a Four Letter Word
GOLDBLADE - Black Elvis
CAKE - Short Skirt/Long Jacket
GRINDERMAN - No Pussy Blues
MEGADETH - Tornado of Souls
FAN DEATH - Cannibal
KILLING JOKE - Wardance
TERRORVISON - Glad All Over (Dave Clark Five cover)
GAMA BOMB - Zombi Brew
PNAU - Embrace (ft Ladyhawke)
AT THE DRIVE-IN - One Armed Scissor
MARILYN MANSON - Antichrist Superstar
MUNICIPAL WASTE - Unleash the Bastards

The Spotted Ant #1

2010-01-24T15:32:00.001-08:00

One thing I notice folk tend to on blogs is cobble together little playlist files of tracks and link to a storage site. Great stuff, but I've decided to take a different tack for a couple of reasons: a) I want to encourage folk to sign up to and use Spotify where possible, and b) I ended up getting 3(!) DMCA takedowns for my Top 10 of 2009, so I don't want to push my luck. I'm not even a Hype Machine listed music blogger. Tsk.

So if you have Spotify, then you'll want to keep an eye out for "The Spotted Ant" posts as I'll be a sharing a playlist fortnightly or so. Nothing overly special, just an hour of tracks that I'm digging at the time, past and present. Of course, I am limited by official releases so I can't add anything until it's a released single at the earliest, but it's worth a go. Think of it like a radio show but without me wittering on between songs. Just here.

I'll post the link and also show the playlist here so you can decide whether or not to bother...

Enjoy the first one.

The Spotted Ant #1

MINISTRY - Stigmata
CONVERGE - Reap What You Sow
CRYSTAL CASTLES - Crimewave (Crystal Castles vs Health)
THE REPLACEMENTS - I Will Dare
YEASAYER - Ambling Alp
ROCKET FROM THE CRYPT - Lipstick
MEW - The Zookeeper's Boy
SIOUXSIE AND THE BANSHEES - Arabian Knights
KLAXONS - Atlantis to Interzone
MARIACHI EL BRONX - Cell Mates
BEHEMOTH - Ov Fire and Void
NEW ORDER - Mr Disco
SOUNDGARDEN - Hands All Over
CANCER BATS - Agenda Suicide (The Faint cover)
DEXYS MIDNIGHT RUNNERS - There There My Dear

Album Review: LOSTPROPHETS - The Betrayed (Visible Noise)

2010-01-20T13:49:00.000-08:00

I bet you forgot about them. For quite some time, the Welsh wonders were all over the UK rock press, being all arrogant and "American" and cocky and trendy and all sorts of things that confused pretty much everyone who had actually met them. No doubt there were many sniggers and "told you so's" when stories of the fourth album's initial sessions being scrapped because the band simply weren't happy with them. Prima Donnas, clearly. Or possibly because they wanted to have a decent crack at the thing entirely by themselves. After all, it's not like they didn't have a band member in bassist Stuart Richardson who wasn't able to handle production duties themselves.

It certainly starts off confidently. If It Wasn't For Hate, We'd be Dead by Now strides in on the kind of drum loop that Trent Reznor wanted to copyright before a towering hook rolls thing along swiftly. Dstryr/Dstryr then wallops you round the chops into oblivion. It's four-and-a-half-minutes of relentless riffery complete with an anthemic chorus and hook, a calm before the moshing storm and a bit of shred too. It also becomes one of the best things they've done pretty much immediately. We then cut to the singles one-two of It's Not the End of the World... and Where We Belong, both of which give superb chorus. Next Stop Atro City then bursts through waving their Metal! baton and serves up a bit of double-pedal too.

In comparison, the second half of the record is far less frenetic, but no less pleasing. The likes of A Better Nothing and Darkest Blue both represent a particular epic approach to the "pop-rock" manual that the boyos can claim as their own, while Dirty Little Heart is centred around a classic '8os keyboard line that could easily have fit onto the soundtrack of any John Hughes movie. It then becomes obvious as the record continues that the band have realised what they're genuinely good at and focused on simply making it better. The aforementioned Dstryr/Dstryr is Start Something's Burn Burn, but hooked up to South Wales' premier grid. Where We Belong is Liberation Transmission's Rooftops, but instead of gingerly waving the "Classic Rock" trophy around with shy caution, it holds it aloft with fervent majesty while shouting "It's mine, mine I tell you!".

As expected from what is essentially a solo effort, it's not perfect. For He's a Jolly Good Felon links a nifty New Wave riff and organ to a chorus that is pretty forgettable, while Streets of Nowhere seems to have the mantra "token happy pop song" stamped on it. As a pop song, it's pretty good, but it doesn't seem to fit with what's around it. If anything, it's a great little b-side. There also seems to be an omission of their interpretation of "the quieter ballad" which they were getting rather good at. It's frequently hinted at, but it's only when you get to atmospheric closer The Light That Shines Twice As Bright... that you realise there hasn't been an obvious let-up in the overall pace of the record.

Still, one thing is for certain - this is undeniably and 100% a Lostprophets album. It's even got plenty of that sampling digital doo-hickery between tracks that was missing on their last effort, and that's a good thing. The band built a reputation as a great live band not just for their performance, but their on-stage banter and larking about which always exclaimed "we are bloody well loving this". After previous efforts were limited by budget, a producer's trademarked drum sound and the odd necessary compromise, The Betrayed sounds like the album that Lostprophets have always wanted to make, and the boyos have come up trumps.

8/10

Albums of the year 2009 "From Years Gone By"

2010-01-03T16:18:00.000-08:00

This blog should be bleeding obvious in its title. There's a whole world of music out there from the past to be discovered. Here's what I stumbled upon that tickled a lot of my fancy in 2009:

10) THE AUTEURS - New Wave (Hut, 1993)

Vocalist Luke Haines recently wrote a book about Britpop-come-autobiography. It was very good so I listened to his old band's first album. That was also rather good, and I then wondered why they were never that big in the mid-1990s. Then I remember Luke saying in "Bad Vibes" it's because everyone listened to Suede instead. D'oh.

9) THE SMITHS - Strangeways, Here We Come (Rough Trade, 1987)

As a swansong, you can't complain. Veering from jaunty to fey to the somewhat overwraught, Morrissey lets it all out one last time before ditching the "hangers-on". That it also contains some of Johnny Marr's finest riffs as well is an added bonus.

8) NEW ORDER - Technique (Factory, 1989)

Even though they were never that "rock 'n' roll", the Mancs had one of the harshest rides in music. The tragic end to their preceding band Joy Division; The record-breaking single; The funding of a historic nightlcub that never made any money at all; Still, they recorded some classics along the way, thank goodness, and Technique is probably "the one".

7 ) MANIC STREET PREACHERS - Gold Against The Soul (Columbia, 1993)

Big whoops. There I was focusing on the acclaimed likes of debut Generation Terrorists and immortally scathing The Holy Bible and I practically ignored the frequently maligned album in- between, only to find out it was actually rather unfairly maligned. Maybe it doesn't have as many great tracks as other albums, but history now proves it to be a shiny vibrant rock gem as opposed to the corporate cock-suck it was made out to be at the time by some. Idiots.

6) TUBEWAY ARMY - Replicas (Beggars Banquet, 1979)

Young Gary was jamming with his so-so punk rock band one day and started dicking about with a synthesizer that some muso geek had left behind in the studio. Awesome then followed.

5) ROCKET FROM THE CRYPT - RFTC (Interscope, 1998)

Rocket From The Crypt were the best Rock 'n' Roll band in the world to never have a Number 1 hit. They were never huge, and for this reason alone, human society should hang its collective head in shame.

4) DEXYS MIDNIGHT RUNNERS - Searching For The Young Soul Rebels (EMI, 1980)

Weddings and cheesy nightclubs have a lot to answer for, ensuring that most people will only ever remember a great band's "big hit", and maybe even think of said band as a "One Hit Wonder". This is unacceptable. Searching... was the Northern Soul debut from Dexys that precede Come on Eileen by two years. It included the marvellous single Geno as well as justified classics Tell Me When My Light Turns Green and There There My Dear. Listen to it. Dance. Feel Good. Pass it On.

3) VITALIC - Ok Cowboy (Citizen, 2005)

When folk consider what the French are good at, they normally think of the obvious: Red Wine; Kissing; Revolutions; Whimsical movies about benevolent cafe-workers...but no-one ever thinks of synthesized pop, unless they know what they're talking about. Pascal Arbez is up there with Jean-Michel Jarre and Air in conjuring up pure magic with the keyboard, as well as keeping plenty of variety in the mix. No track sounds the same and the whole thing effortlessly flows. From the Motorcycle digital Metal of My Friend Dario through the analogue stutter of Repair Machines to the introverted pulse of Trahison. A ruddy pleasure from start to finish.

2) THE KNIFE - Silent Shout (Rabid, 2006)

It's entirely feasible that Swedish sibling duo The Knife are actually from another planet. There's plenty of electronica out there, but no-one sounds as damn unique as these two. Silent Shout doesn't follow the same blueprint as previous effort Deep Cuts and was probably conjured up during a field trip to the Astral Plane. Iincredibly inhuman and intensely gratifying, when the restrained chill-out likes of Forest Families and The Captain get the adrenaline rushing as much as the extra-terrestrial pop of We Share Our Mothers' Health, you know the world is so very right in parts.

1) CRYSTAL CASTLES - Crystal Castles (Last Gang, 2008)

This may set a precedent in future years in that my top album of "years gone by" is only from the previous year and was discovered ever-so-slightly too late. Had I came across this dazzling belter just a month earlier and it would have certainly made my Top 10 of 2008. As it was, no dice, but the praise is understood. Taking digital "nintendo-core" as far as possible without making it unlistenable, Crystal Castles is a shining tribute to the infinite possibilities of what throwaway computer sounds can actually offer the world of music. Courtship Dating (Pop); Air War (Digital Prog); Xxzxcuzx Me (Rave/Heavy/Bleeding Mental); Tell Me What To Swallow (Ambient) and everything else in between. If The Machines really are winning, they're certainly pacifying us well.

I've made it!

2009-12-30T15:11:00.001-08:00

Yes, folks, it's happened. You know your blog has made it when you receive a "DMCA takedown notification‏"! In English, this means that some official record company bod has objected to me sharing an mp3 and gone crying to Blogger like the big baby that they are, DESPITE my little friendly disclaimer at the bottom. Some people, eh?

The problem here is the "offending" blog was my Top 10 albums list...with 10 mp3 links...and no specification which link it was. I said e-mail me directly - it's not hard, you know. I've got to bloody well guess now haven't I? And I'm guessing it was the Depeche Mode mp3, ironically enough. Favourite band they may be, but they will come with baggage. Namely being on a major record label in the USA with the sort of unforgiving attitude towards even the slightest bit of friendly sharing. I believe the same happened to The Vinyl Villain shortly after he posted his first and only DM mp3.

Consequently I've replaced the link with the video for Fragile Tension. Mainly because the vid for Hole To Feed is somewhat on the fucked-up side. All the other links are staying because I'm confident they're safe.

It amuses me as the RSS feed of the blog is already stuck in my Facebook note feed, so that mp3 is still there for folk on my friend list. Oh well. Never mind, etc.

What do you think about it, Jarvis?

Albums of the Year 2009

2009-12-15T15:19:00.001-08:00

10) STEEL PANTHER - Feel The Steel (Island)

It's probably heresy to include such an album in a serious review of the year. There's no way anyone could possibly consider a full-on comedic pisstake of the idiotic excess of '80s glam metal in an end-of-year spotlight - it's bad enough it was enjoyed in the first place! Well, comedy or not, this is certainly one of the most enjoyable records of the year, both in daft, exaggerated lyrical output ("What'd you have to do for that backstage pass, 'cause I found a poisoned laminate inside of your ass..." - Girl From Oklahoma), to gloriously questionable song titles - Asian Hooker, Fat Girl (Thar She Blows) - to some of the best glam metal hooks heard in many a year. The sound of men old enough to know better, and doing it anyway 'cause they're bloody good at it.

Check Out: Eyes of a Panther

9) VITALIC - Flashmob (Citizen)

If there's one thing we've learnt in recent years, is that it's never a bad idea to give anyone of Gallic persuasion some synthesizers, samplers and all the rest as they'll probably get it absolutely right. Pascal Arbez's second offering under his Vitalic pseudonym picks up where debut OK Cowboy left off - subtle bleeps and beats juxtaposed alongside robotic lady vocals and introverted rhythms. With a sound more interesting than fellow countrymen Justice and Chromeo, the likes of Terminateur Benelux, Your Disco Song and the title track prove that Arbez is the natural successor in a line including Jean Michel Jarre and Daft Punk. French hands are good for something after all.

Check Out: Station Mir 2099

8) ALICE IN CHAINS - Black Gives Way To Blue (Parlophone)

There are rules in this business. Your first album after fourteen years should be a tepid and slack-jawed affair with only a hint of the fire that kept you going in your classic period, even if there has been a tragic event since. The last thing we should expect is such an assured belter that draws on history whilst adding something new. AIC's return effort takes that distinctive sound but applies it to an epic assurance where there was once utter despair. Check My Brain and Lesson Learned are righteous classics while the title track and Your Decision reminds us that a delicate touch was as much their forte as their riffs. A justified comeback.

Check Out: Lesson Learned

7) MANIC STREET PREACHERS - Journal For Plague Lovers (Sony)

If the headlines were a bit predictable ("The Holy Bible, the sequel", etc.), then the album wasn't. Yes, it was the most caustic and visceral they'd been after a lengthy period of daytime-radio friendly material, but it was by no means a complete retreat to a time when they were the UK's angriest rock band. If anything, delving into missing guitarist Richie James' remaining lyrics book allowed the band to tap into the unique catharsis that they had left behind and apply it to the maturity and assured grasp of songwriting they've developed since the mid-90s. As a result, tracks such as Me and Stephen Hawking and All is Vanity summed up all of the Manics' best attributes from the last 20 years.

Check Out: All is Vanity

6) FLORENCE + THE MACHINE - Lungs (Island)

As much as it's easy to disregard folk who blindly follow hyped artists like they eat cake, we shouldn't forget that those who purposefully avoid said artists are just as foolish. Now and then, there will be a damn good reason why there's hype and Florence is it. Even before the album's release, her live show with her band The Machine was getting justified good press for it's energy and great tracks - tracks which are kinda folk, but a bit rock, and very pop, and slightly dancey, and just plain unique. It translated to an album that was as breathtaking and beautiful as it was epic and hard-hitting. "Worth a listen" doesn't even come close.

Check Out: Howl

5) BETWEEN THE BURIED AND ME - The Great Misdirect (Victory)

I have no idea where to start. Is it the Grand-Guignol-organ inspired madness that permeates through the lurching death metal of Disease, Injury, Madness? The jazzy honky-tonk that underpins the ragged hardcore of Fossil Genera..? The sublime bliss of the Western-tinged semi-acoustic Desert of Song? Or do I go with the truly epic brutal prog that is Swim To The Moon? What I will say is this is as good and awe-inspiring as previous effort Colors, and that enough is all you need to know.

Check Out: Desert of Song

4) DEPECHE MODE - Sounds Of The Universe (Mute)

If anything, SOTU is a relief. Previous album Playing The Angel was solid but seemed to tread water and felt frequently uninspired. While nothing on their twelfth album can be described as a radical departure, there's definitely some newly-discovered life in these synthesized bones. The likes of Fragile Tension and Peace are respectful additions to their established canon, but it's tracks such as the grandiose Wrong and disturbing Corrupt that prove that something a bit different is still in reach. There's also the likes of Come Back, which could be their most impassioned offering since Condemnation in 1993. The best thing is, there's nothing to suggest they should call it a day just yet.

Check Out: Come Back

3) LA ROUX - La Roux (Polydor)

It's guaranteed that duos and synthesizers are winners. Soft Cell; Eurythmics; Yazoo; Pet Shop Boys; Erasure; La Roux. Granted, the final name may be twenty-odd years too late, but Elly and Ben are worthy additions. At worst, they're a fantastic '80s tribute act. At best, they're a talented partnership that have mastered the art of colourful songwriting in one shot. Such a triumph will always yield the obvious classy singles (In For The Kill, Bulletproof) but will throw up more aggressive fare in Tigerlily or something as dreamy as Armour Love. Debut of the year, but only just.

Check Out: Tigerlily

2) CONVERGE - Axe To Fall (Epitaph)

British metal fans will probably be a bit fed up with the ignorant criticism "It's just noise" after recent events in the national singles charts. However, it's always been a compliment with Converge, as they have spent the last fifteen years taking the concept of noise and twisting and fucking it into something uniquely primal. The applause that Axe To Fall justifies is not that they continue to do it so well, but that a cleaner, more pristine sound still results in one of the harshest things they've done. Dark Horse, Reap What You Sow and Cutter are relentless bouts of the kind of calculated-but-unhinged savagery we've come to expect, but better. However, it's the unsettling one-two climax of Cruel Bloom and the disturbing ambiance of Wretched World where Converge prove that whatever they do, they are rarely bettered. The other argument of its comparison to the legendary Jane Doe is not one I want to get into right now, but give me a couple of years.

Check Out: Reap What you Sow

1) METRIC - Fantasies (Last Gang)

Simplicity is the key. Stripping rock music to its core and just nudging the vitriol away with a bit of warmth and reason. Taking the bare elements of pop music and adding some epic flourish. You could end up with Fantasies, but it's unlikely now as it's been done and probably won't be done again. These Canadians continue to confuse logic by not being bloody huge already. This is rock music without the headache. Pop music without the feeling of a saccharine overdose. Dance music without the established boundaries. There is no question that this band should be loved and adored by everyone, but they're not. And maybe that's part of their mystique and appeal.

The whole thing is proof that with the right ingredients, magic can be conjured up. Help, I'm Alive is epic beauty without an epic touch. Gold Guns Girls is what a driving compilation really craves. Satellite Mind and Front Row are perverse little bastards that you know you want more of while Sick Muse and Gimme Sympathy are very different but still the two best pop songs you'll hear all year.

Whether they'll be as effective without Emily Haines' dreamy vocals is worth a debate, but there's no denying this is a fantastic group effort. Beautiful, inspired, sexy, magic and pretty much every other positive adjective you can think of - Fantasies should be the album to convert you to this stunning and individual band.

Check Out: Satellite Mind

Boogie days

2009-12-09T13:54:00.000-08:00

Cheers to Rol.

List 10 musical artists (or bands) you like, in no specific order (do this before reading the questions below). Really, don’t read the questions below until you pick your ten artists!!!

1: Lostprophets
2: Depeche Mode
3: The Knife
4: Rocket From The Crypt
5: Ladytron
6: Lamb of God
7: Pantera
8: Alexisonfire
9: Crystal Castles
10: Carter the Unstoppable Sex Machine

PS - Facebook readers - visit the original blog cos there be videos embedded. Yay.

What was the first song you ever heard by 6?

The title track of the second album As The Palaces Burn - Autumn 2003 on a Metal Hammer mag compilation. I wasn't too sure at first - I was impressed by the scything viciousness but craved a bit more brutality. I quickly realised that the aggressive approach of a deranged heart-surgeon was as good as a hooligan with a sledgehammer.

What is your favorite song of 8?

Really not sure of this one. At the moment, I'm loving Sons of Privilege off new album Old Crows/Young Cardinals more than anything. That'll do for now.

What kind of impact has 1 left on your life?

Where do I start? Seriously, I haven't got a clue, and a few words can't really sum it up.

The band themselves struck a chord being the young British geeks they are who preferred Star Wars over Rock 'n' roll excess. I probably also started to wear clothes that actually fit me as a result of listening to them. I'm not ashamed of it - someone had to do it!

Apart from that, let's just say that I've met people through this band who, honest to God, I love. I don't ever say it, and I don't really talk to them enough - mainly because I'm just a bit crap socially - but these are people who I don't ever want to lose contact with and now hold in higher regard than other folk I've known for as long or longer.

What is your favorite lyric of 5?

Seventeen , Light & Magic (2002)

They only want you when you're seventeen,
When you're twenty-one you're no fun,
They take a Polaroid and let you go,
Say they let you know, so come on

Not from a sing-a-long fun point of view, 'cause that would be just a bit weird. From a poetic view, however, it stands out a bloody mile.

How many times have you seen 4 live?

Never. *Sniff*

What is your favorite song by 7?

Tough one, again. Just like the band. I'm going to put it out there and say Heresy off Cowboys From Hell.

Is there any song by 3 that makes you sad?

I wouldn't say so. There's a particular melancholic euphoria about a lot of their work, but no sadness, not for me anyway. I get sad that most people haven't heard them, though. Not to worry, here's an education.

What is your favorite song by 9?

Air War - Cracking. Not an official video but it bloody works.

When did you first get into 2?

At either end of 1998, at ages 17/18. That probably makes no sense but it's fairly true. At the beginning of that year, I picked up latest album Ultra. I'd always liked what I heard from the band since I first heard Enjoy the Silence at age 10 in 1990 but I never became a fan. As '98 started, I was quite the metalhead, but became aware of Depeche's influence on a few rock bands I was into at the time. Being aware of their '80s pop history swayed me.

I enjoyed Ultra but didn't dive headlong into them as it was metal, metal, metal at the time. At the end of 1998 at Art College, I discovered a small indie record shop in Epsom. They still had a lot of MC cassettes, including all of their '80s albums @ £2.50 each. I started with 1984's Some Great Reward and scooped up the rest just after new year. They became my favourite band a handful of years later.

How did you get into 3?

My first exposure was coming across Heartbeats - yes, a song made famous by some folkie with a load of colourful bouncy balls. This is actually the far superior original. However, it was through reading the second volume of Phonogram that I became curious about them and started digging a bit more. For secondary reference - Phonogram is brilliant and I recommend it for any passionate music fan.

What is your favorite song by 4?

Born in '69. Essential

How many times have you seen 9 live?

None. Yet. Roll on the second album.

What is a good memory concerning 2?

If anything, seeing them for the first (and only so far) time back in 2001 on the Exciter tour. Don't get me wrong, their music is as good as it gets for me, but as none of my mates share those feelings, I've not had any "good times" socially where this band have been the center of great attention. If that makes sense to you.

Is there a song by 8 that makes you sad?

Nope

What is your favorite song by 1?

Last Summer - does it for me every time.

How did you become a fan of 10?

Fan is probably the wrong word. Again, they're a band I liked through Top 40 listens due my early teens, but I never got into them - they never really fit into any big trends at the time, even though they had a solid fan base. What's attracted me in recent years is their identity - I can't think of any band that they sound like. JimBob's poetry is inspired and for me, they remain one of the most English of bands all things considered. So here you go:

Ant's Comic Den: Spider-Man Trades.

2009-11-10T13:13:00.000-08:00

In recent years, various friends have casually commented that they should "try comics out". Not with any great enthusiasm, but the kind of positive curiosity you might associate with indulging in an increasingly-socially acceptable bedroom fetish. Why not? - let's try something different, that kind of thinking. Normally they don't, but a handful of mates have dipped their toes, with a couple gaining a taste for certain characters at the very least. However, they have chosen to focus on stocking up on the trade paperbacks - collected editions of the monthly titles. This backs up my thinking that unless you get into the monthly purchasing cycle before your mid-teens, it ain't going to happen as you discover other things. Like being sociable, drinking and meeting women - all things that no comic book fan has ever done in their life cause God said they couldn't. No, really.

Still, there are the trades, and for a few years now, it's been possible to keep up with major characters' monthly adventures simply by getting the trade when it's released a bit later. Add to this a trade history that will showcase classic and signficant storylines and there's no reason not to have a healthy library devoted to one character. On that note, this post is dedicated to Marvel Comics' Spider-Man. A character who I've been a fan of for 25 years and have nearly all the issues from that period. I would gloat at how much it's worth, but I'd be lying as it's the '60s issues that would allow me a mortgage deposit. If ol' Spidey has always tickled your webbed fancy, but his back issue history scares you a bit, just pick up these ten trades for now and work from there:

1: AMAZING SPIDER-MAN OMNIBUS, VOL. 1

Collects Amazing Fantasy #15, Amazing Spider-Man (ASM) # 1-38, ASM Annuals #1-2 + other small stories from other titles.

Essential. This is where it all started. Stan Lee and Steve Ditko's original run from 1962-66 is all here with a few extras. The origin, Peter's high school shenanigans, first appearances of too many classic villains. Owning these stories in some format is a necessity to being a Spider-fan. This one handy hardcover (HC) volume is a few bob, though, but panic not. The same stories can be found in the first three volumes of the ASM corner of Marvel's "Masterworks" range, or if you're a tight arse, the first two volumes of the black-and-white "Essential" trade range of ASM.

2: SPIDER-MAN VISIONARIES: JOHN ROMITA SR.

Collects ASM # 39-42, 50,68-69, 108-109.

This '60s ASM collection showcases Romita Sr's interpretation of Spidey - one that would provide the template for Spidey artists for almost the next two decades. These college years are as essential as Parker's high school as his circle of friends solidified and love started to blossom. If you want more of the Lee/Romita run, it can be found in volumes 3-5 of the ASM "Essential" range.

3: SPIDER-MAN: DEATH OF THE STACYS

Collects ASM #88-92, 121-122

Two tragic stories in one edition, the events in here may have you wondering why some folk are so damned insistent that comics will always be throwaway kids' entertainment. They are also a lesson in why Doctor Octopus and Norman Osborn's Green Goblin will always hold a more significant place in Spider-man's rogues gallery than others.

4: SPIDER-MAN: WIZARD MASTERPIECE

Collects ASM #229-232, 248, Spectacular Spider-Man (SSM) #107-10

Industry mag Wizard knows its stuff. Enclosed within are four '80s stories widely regarded as Spidey's best. His scraps with Juggernaut, Mr Hyde and Cobra showcase Webs at his bantering best, while the poignant "Kid Who Collects Spider-Man" is in a league of his own. Spidey also dons his black costume to face off against the psycho serial killer Sin-Eater.

5: SPIDER-MAN: BIRTH OF VENOM

Collects ASM #252-59, 298-300, 316-17, Web of Spider-Man (WSM) #1

Spidey has bought back a nifty new costume from some other planet. Alas, it turns out to be a parasite. Whoops. A two-arc collection with Parker's possession followed by Eddie Brock's. Every hero needs his evil mirror-image villain - Spidey finally gained his.

6: SPIDER-MAN: KRAVEN'S LAST HUNT

Collects ASM #293-4, SSM #131-2, WSM #31-2

It wouldn't be unfair to regard this as Spidey's most macabre story ever. J M DeMatteis' stark journey into Kraven's damaged psyche wasn't common in 1987, but still stands very tall today, more so than similar examinations of villains in recent years. Dark and frequently disturbing, this is also not one for the claustrophobic

7: SPIDER-MAN LEGENDS: TODD MACFARLANE VOL 2

Collects #ASM 306-14

Todd MacFarlane may be a big shot in all areas of comics and toys now, but there was a time when he was just a young hotshot artist with a highly original take on the Wall-Crawler. This collection starts a few issues in to MacFarlane's ASM run when he was at his best and includes his take on baddies Mysterio, Lizard and Green Goblin during the company-wide "Inferno" crossover. You can get his sole-created and violent "Torment" trade but this has way more substance. Probably because David Michelinie is a better writer.

8: AMAZING SPIDER-MAN BY J MICHAEL STRACZYNSKI: ULTIMATE COLL. VOL. 1

Collects ASM Vol 2 #30-45.

"Babylon 5" creator Straczynski teamed with John Romita Jr in 2001 to start a classic run on ASM, which includes these first sixteen issues. Granted, it followed up a 90s' full of symbiotes, clones and a forgettable John Byrne rehash, but the new characters and ideas introduced here are incredibly logical and overdue for a literary character this old. You'll see what I mean. It also includes Marvel's moving tribute to 9/11.

9: CIVIL WAR: AMAZING SPIDER-MAN

Collects ASM # 532-38.

There have been a few significant events in Spidey's title in the last five years, but this deserves inclusion purely for the revelation within - an event that is almost anathema to such a major character. It also includes a brief look at the "Iron-Spider" costume provided by Tony Stark during his time in the Avengers.
It's also worth picking up the main Civil War trade while you're at it.

10: ULTIMATE SPIDER-MAN: ULTIMATE COLLECTION VOL. 1

Collects Ultimate Spider-Man #1-13

Marvel's Ultimate Universe is pretty much a new-millennium update of the classic Marvel Universe and was a good jumping-on point for new readers in 2000. The first year of issues here are regarded as being almost perfect. Great writing, great art and a brilliant first meeting with the Kingpin. You'll think of this wher you hear any "fat" jokes afterwards.

Just to be clear, there's plenty more out there, but these get my vote for the most essential. I appreciate there's sod-all from the '90s, but there isn't currently a great deal out there save for 1993's "Maximum Carnage" trade - damn good, but a bit flawed. However, the 2-year "Clone Saga" is being released in staged volumes from next year, which in retrospect, is overdue, I think.

The OC, Part 2: You Stay Classy, San Diego.

2009-08-11T10:59:00.000-07:00

Yes, alright. Whatever. I have returned home and this particular offering is 2 weeks overdue. But as I was on holiday, and thus automatically supposed to be avoiding internet log-ons save for Facebook checks, this is late. Ok?! Tough.

So, off to Comic-Con to be surrounded by large redneck males of a sweaty variety and hormoneally-rampant Twilight fangirls. A plesant journey along the Pacific Coast also yielded a view of some power station or other shaped like Tits. This only gets a mention as it was featured in a rather funny film once and thus generated the kind of geeky "wows" in a similar way that visiting the "Dawn of the Dead" mall would. Or maybe that's just me.

After checking into our Marriot hotel on the north end of the city, we had nothing to do except go into the city and wander and get our weekend passes sorted. An initial fret over cabbing it downtown each time was quashed by the discovery of a tram line close by that took you right outside the centre. And into the paths of a main road, the main Amtrax West Coast railroad and best part of 130,000 geeks and Cosplayers. The convention Centre is huge, by my stanrads anyway. A nifty glass building that is probably about a third of a mile long. With two floors, it seems to be at least five times as big as Earls Court. The upstairs is a mass of rooms for panels and gatherings but it's the downstairs exhibition hall that hits you. About 5000 booths of companies, retailers, creators, promoters. If it's geek, it's here.

The next 4 days were just me geeking out really. I attended various Marvel Comics preview panels and managed to get into the "Kick-Ass" preview. And despite intitial skepticism, the footage did indeed Kick Ass. One to watch, especially as it includes a perfect interpretation of the scene featuring a 10-year-old Hit Girl slicing and dicing drug dealers in a downtown apartment. To the Tune of Banana Splitz. That's in the film, not the comic book.

I was lucky enoguth to meet and shake hands with some favourite creators who you've probably never heard of but I'll gush anyway.

Frank Cho - Liberty Meadows, Shanna The She Devil, Mighty Avengers
Josh Howard - Dead @ 17, Black Harvest
Scott Kurtz - PVP
John Romita Jr - Amazing Spider-Man, Iron Man, Daredevil, Kick-Ass

And some bloke called, er, Stanley? Stan? Lee? Stanner? Something like that, anyway.
He was nice.

And then there's The Mighty Boosh. Chuffed enough that they were doing a panel and a small show in town on Friday that we were off to, Friday night yielded a bit of a shock when we bumped into them staying at our hotel! Out of all the hotels, etc. After letting them finish their post-flight meal in the lobby, Andrea said hi to Noel and Julian in as controlled a way as she could, whilst beckoning to her British friends. They said hello with handshakes and after a few words, indicated their jet-lagged-ness. "I'm so jetlagged", said Julian. And he was. Our paths crossed occasionally after that.

Also:

- we visited Hooters - nice Tits, not-so-good food.
- visited a submarine and old ship. Well, Matt did, being the military geek he is.
- I got told by a Suicide Girl my accent was adorable. Yeah, well, wait til you see my **CENSORED***
- Matt requested an "offensive insult" be inserted into a Penny Arcade trade by it's creator for his mate's gift. He wrote "Cunt Puncher".
- saw Elvis:

The OC, Part 1: It ain't half hot, Mum!

2009-07-22T12:08:00.000-07:00

Whoever told me that jet lag ain't so bad going backwards wasn't entirely on the ball. Or maybe they didn't take into account almost a lifetime of not flying and then undertaking a mammoth 10-hour flight to the other side of the planet practically via the Arctic Circle! Add to this a natural dose of genetic anxiety, worry, and post-9/11 fear and it's quite surprising that my co-traveller Mat didn't wallop me one. Still, as a pilot himself, he probably had perspective and understood my attitude.

As it was, the flight was spot-on, helped by Virgin Atlantic's cool on-board entertainment. I finally managed to see In The Loop, so happy there. Take-off and Landing weren't the experiences I feared they would be, and you can forget the "humourless immigration official" cos they were quite pleasant and friendly and have no objection to Jaffa and Battenburg cakes being brought in. Hour and a half, tops. Then came the reunion with my close mate and host Andrea and a drive to her gaff in Irvine, Orange County.

A chilled Chai at the local Starbucks in the OC nighttime humidity preceded a pre-sleep chill out at our digs, combined with a chat to the family. Lovely people. Although booze and snacks were avoided due to the general feeling of my internal organs being in the wrong places. Nighttime didn't bring much sleep, only basic rest, but helped until I got a decent night the night after.

A "lumberjack slam" at Denny's was the official breakfast - basically an American fry-up with pancakes and toast. It successfully defeated me so I know my limits for now as I work on expanding the stomach further. The rest of the day was spent heading to the coast. Stopping off first at a cove in Corona Del Mar, near Newport Beach, to get my feet's first taste of the Pacific Ocean and a climb over rocks that would not be permitted in Margate as we can't actally look after ourselves. I didn't recognise anything from "The OC" initially, but no doubt we'll be back.

This was then followed by a 6-mile coast drive to Laguna Beach to marvel at the hideousness of the seaside Hollywood so emphasised by the god-awful MTV show. Except it wasn't. Yes the rich swines' houses are easily spotted on the surrounding hills, but the beach and centre were just awash with happy families and all sorts. A cool mix of affordable boutiques and art galleries, Laguna Beach was quite pleasant.

The drive home was via those aforementioned hills, so it felt like a California version of leaving north from Brighton through the South Downs. After a steak meal at Chilis compete with the most gorgeous garlic bread ever, we headed to the Irish-themed pub, The Auld Dubliner, for a Guinness.

Today, we're off to San Diego for the Comic Con. I will no doubt elaborate further on this whole experience and the culture shock a bit further down the line.

And if you're wondering about the giraffe, his name's Stephen and he's another co-traveller. I'll explain later.

By George

2009-04-23T15:01:00.000-07:00

Use the word "Patriotism" to a lot of people in the world who can speak English and chances are that they'll picture the kind of extreme American images and speeches that would give a Fox News executive a hard-on. In fact, it wouldn't be surprising to find that the US Republican party have trademarked the word and its offshoots, seeming as they like to ram home the fact that that being a Patriot is the only way to be a decent human being with a US passport.

But the fact remains there's nothing wrong with being a Patriot in the most straightforward of ways. Our history, culture, political status, social attitudes and everything else will always contribute to our upbringing and so it should be guaranteed that we have a grateful affection to where we come from, especially if we're lucky enough to live in a democracy. We should love our country, but I should concede we should not automatically be proud of it - that's a different thing entirely.I'm the former, but definitely not the latter.

If you're scratching your heads over my slightly highbrow topic, it's because today is St George's Day and, as England's patron Saint, a reason to celebrate being English. Except about half of English folk don't have a clue about it, while a significant proportion of them have never heard of St George. His origins and history is questionable, but the fact remains he is the English patron Saint. It still appears to be socially unacceptable to mark the day, yet us English get St Patrick's day rammed home every March. I love Guinness, but I have no Irish heritage so do I have a right to celebrate March 17th?

The Scots, Welsh and Irish are encouraged by the man to be faithful to their flag, but not the English. Why? The Empire? It was British, so scratch that. The only reason a lot of folk can give is due to the fascistic impulses of the lardy English football hooligan community - a picture all too indelibly marked on the conciousness of our media and the face of a Turk. Does it come down to the fact that the English, a nation that gets on with it with a bit of a moan but no overwhelming melodrama, doesn't need a national day - we're English all year round, what's the point of a special day?

Anyway, the point of this is Happy St George's Day - if you care that is. I'm marking this day on a childish principle right now - most other countries have a national day of sorts, so this is ours. No fuss, just a respecful nod, which to me really is the English way, I guess.

I can't leave without throwing up some tracks that , to me, are wholely English. Enjoy and, as usual, dig deeper.

SAXON - Wheels of Steel (live)(1980)

Classic English Metal. 'Nuff said.

CARTER THE UNSTOPPABLE SEX MACHINE - The Only Living Boy in New Cross (1992, The Love Album, 1992)

Shamefully overlooked Sarf Lahndon Grebo drum loopers with daft haircuts.

THE STREETS - The Irony of it All (Original Pirate Material, 2002)

Three English staples - the self-righteous pub thug, the stoned student hippie and Garage.

SHAM 69 - Hurry Up Harry (That's Life, 1978)

"We're going down the puuuuuuub" - It doesn't sound as good if it's not sung in an English accent

NEW ORDER - World in Motion (1990)

Well, I couldn't resist

I don't know what I'm doing...

2009-03-25T13:22:00.000-07:00

In anticipation of the release of The Damned United later this week - joint book and movie review to follow - and foreign football fans' asking "Derby Who?", here's a brief funny lifted from the BBC's "Alas Smith and Jones" show from 1986.

I's like to insert some witty remark about how things change. Alas, most of them are still as close to the non-league as they were then, save for Burnley.

Depeche Mode Week - Day 7: Sound of Final Orders

2009-03-24T15:51:00.000-07:00

Made it. Shan't be trying this again methinks.

Anyways, the end of this week has bought us to the here and now, just in time for new album Sounds of the Universe, out April 19/20th. Based on the rumours and what bits I've heard, it stands to be their best since 1993's Songs of Faith and Devotion. First single Wrong is one unsettling mindfuck of a record. At first listen, it's a bit "hmmmm", with an apparent lack of dynamics. Just give it a couple of listens. Trust me.

As for the video? It just shows that Americans should join Europe and have their reverse gear next to them on the floor...

Depeche Mode week - Day 6: Walking in Clarke's shoes

2009-03-23T12:04:00.000-07:00

In what has evidently been a very long week and thus a completely failed experiment, day 6 of this brief guide to Basildon's finest brings us closer to the bloke that scarpered - Vince Clarke.

Having knocked up the first LP Speak and Spell succesfully, Clarke decided Depeche wasn't for him. No animosity but it almost single-handedly had the music press wiping this new lot of the board straight off. We know that turned out to be a false move, but what happened to 'ol Vince? Well, if the name isn't familiar for whatever reason, then you do actually know.

First off, he tapped up a mate from Basildon by the name of Alison Moyet, a fairly streetwise lass that scared the crap out of the Depeche lads, all told. Taking the name Yazoo, (or Yaz to you American lot) Clarke kept the synths and went along with Moyet's belting voice for a few pop nuggets including Nobody's Diary, Only You and this catchy little gem:

Alas, this didn't last long. They parted ways, although it did allow Moyet to gain some respectable success as a solo artist. Have a dig, but I recommend this first off. Don't ask me about the video, I have no idea...

Back to Clarke, who had tinkered with the idea of a project whereby he teamed up with someone for one single then moved on for another. This brainstorm yielded Never Never under the banner of The Assembly with Feargal Sharkey, he of The Undertones teenage-kicking fame.

And that was it. Lord knows what his relationships were like in those days.

Then something happened. He met a lad called Andy Bell, a kind of cross between Alison Moyet and Jimmy Somerville. It worked, big style, and Erasure was born. Mind you, it wasn't instant. 1985's debut album Wonderland was pretty much a commmercial disaster and went quite unnoticed in a pop landscape that was overkill in new acts. It wasn't until the year after, when this baby's chorus hit the radios:

Erasure - Sometimes

What followed was a string of uber-camp synthpop hits that lasted well into the 90s. Blue Savannah is widely regarded as one of the best pop songs ever:

Erasure - Blue Savannah

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Although, for my money, Drama! remains their high point:

Depeche Mode Day 5 - Cover well?

2009-03-09T11:52:00.000-07:00

Yep, I know, I missed a day. Well, 4 days actually. I failed - but that's what you get for having a social life filled with "Watchmen", The FA Cup and ogling at Strippers at my mate's 30th.

So, where was I? Ah, yes - cover versions, helped along by The Saturdays recent foray. Quite a lot of them, in fact. A bit of research bequeathed an entire website that would probably yield a few thousand for me to look at. Sod that, obviously.

What's evident is the covers out there generally nod towards the influence Depeche have had towards rock and dance. The former is mostly represented by a goth crowd while the latter is pretty varied, but seems to consist of a lot of efficient Germans who approach their love of Depeche like they approcah their competitiveness in beating the Brits to the sunbeds in Kos. However, as I'm a bit of a headbanger, I'm probably only in a position to judge the effectiveness of the long-haired brigade's attempts. So with that, here's a critique inspired by Clint Eastwood:

THE GOOD:

Solid, no question. The song is recognisable, and so are the band, which is the best combination. I'm all up for a band doing something interesting with anyone else's song, as long as they don't compromise themselves or try to ape the original too much. Good job. And Christina Scabbia's well fit, innit.

THE BAD

Maybe not a total butchering, but it all sounds so pointless, expecially when you consider his impressive cover of Eurythmics' Sweet Dreams. It's Marilyn on auto-pilot and not trying, and his sickly egocentric voice doesn't fit the song. Or maybe the whole thing sounds bad when you consider Johnny Cash's far superior version.

THE UGLY

Ouch. Proof positive why Rammstein were right to sing in their native German.

Here's a better example of the song covered far better by Shiny Toy Guns

Having a dig on Youtube or Spotify yields a few interesting results here and there, especially from the teens in their bedrooms - another reason to rue this otherwise useful method of communication. However if you want to spend the money, you'll be easily able to track down "For The Masses", a pretty respectable collection of covers from some credible names. It's worth it just for Locust's loungecore version of Master and Servant.

Depeche Mode Week - Day 4: The Albums

2009-03-04T14:06:00.000-08:00

ESSENTIAL

Violator, 1990

There was no excuse really. After a decade of slogging it out and making nothing but either steady or massive progress, there was no reason why they should have got this wrong. The material could have been ok, so-so, alright, and then they would have returned again. But with the maturity gained through regular touring and recording, coupled with a confident grasp of everything they had successfully used so far, the omens were great. It was also handy that a hugely popular electronic-based scene (rave) had given them more ideas for appropriate sounds. Violator was a magnificent achievement - crisp, clean and uplifting as well as dark, unsettling and pained. No more was this in evidence on the two big singles Personal Jesus and Enjoy the Silence. The balance between synths, stripped guitar licks, Gahan's vocals and Flood's production was as perfect as they had ever got, and ever did again. It's a cliche, but after Violator, everything did change and was never the same again.

RECOMMENDED

Black Celebration, 1986

By the time Black Celebration was released, Depeche were established chart artists in the UK if not big-time pop stars. A Best-of album released in 1985 single-handedly stirred the "split" rumour pot, but the truth was Depeche were now used to doing things their way and writing what they wanted to, and were lucky to have an indie label in Mute who backed them up. Gore's experimenting with harsher industrial sounds and darker moods culminated in Black Celebration, an album that wavered from epic, gothic synthesized pop (A Question of Lust, Stripped) to chart-unfriendly stripped-down cabaret (It Doesn't Matter Two, Dressed in Black) Seeing them as original outcasts, the rest of the world got it, even if the UK did not. It's been cited as a major influence by Linkin Park, but don't let that put you off.

Songs of Faith and Devotion, 1993

They got there just in time. Before the band fell apart amidst the drugs, booze and mental breakdowns, they successfully convened to record a group of tracks that were almost prescient. Far more impassioned than ever before, songs such as I Feel You and In Your Room became grandiose examples of elctronic-based rock that tipped its hat to the Grunge school of emotion. Relying on heroin ever more, Gahan bears not just his soul but his very being into this album, suggesting that deep down, he knew he could fall apart at any time, something that is most evident in the pained gospel of Condemnation. It remains their most ambitious album to date.

FOLLOW-UP

Speak and Spell, 1981

They were one of many, but Depeche nailed down this synth-pop thing straight away with their debut, having barely entered their twenties. Catchy fare such as Just Can't Get Enough and New Life fit into the system well, but Photographic and Tora!Tora!Tora! hinted strongly at was what to come. Chief songwriter Vince Clarke got cold feet around the time of release and left to pursue a different approach, but that didn't stop the rest of them

Music For The Masses, 1987

Their worldwide profile was growing as was their confidence. It was no surprise that this opus was their most majestic yet, adding a controlled rock approach to their canon as well as a some applied orchestration. Yes, they had the solid and familiar likes of Behind the Wheel, but there were now tracks such as Strangelove and Nothing. It was prophetic too, as the accompanying tour was their biggest to date.

WILD CARD

Construction Time Again, 1983

The use of synthesizers had added something interesting to Pop since the mid-70s, offering up some bizarre efforts along the way. While CTA was not the strangest of the period, It still raises an eyebrow today. Gore's pilfering of German industrial methods gave us original pop nuggets like Everything Counts and The Landscape is Changing. It also served up the quirky bassline of More Than A Party and the pacifist chanting of Pipeline. Ideas a-plenty, if not easy listening.

NO RUSH

Exciter, 2001

Clean as a whistle and happy-as-larry by the time of Exciter's release, it's not surprising to suggest that a more apt title would have been Relaxer. It's clean digital approach was minmilistic and added weight to the argument that Depeche were just happy to be alive and to have survived the 90s. It's not a bad album, but when the strong tracks I Feel Loved and The Sweetest Condition sound out of place, you realise that they probably could have got away with more time writing the songs.

THE REST

A Broken Frame, 1982
Regarded by the band as their worst album, their sophomore effort is now a good retrospective of a band starting again and having a go anyway. As much hit as miss, it gave us the dreamy instrumental Nothing to Fear at the very least.

Some Great Reward, 1984
More controlled than the previous effort, Gore was by now a confident songwriter with a better sense of how to apply his ideas. People are People and Master and Servant proved his knack for blending mechanics and a good pop hook. The sublime Blasphemous Rumours hinted at something more

Ultra, 1997
Stark and harrowed, this was proof that there was life in the now-grizzled dog, but only just. With the trendy moody trip-hop being used to good effect, the likes of Barrel of a Gun and Useless summed up the previous four years perfectly.

Playing the Angel, 2005
Unremarkable, but reassuring at the same time. This is just an example of Depeche doing what they're good at. Suffer Well, Precious, and Lilian are almost off the conveyor belt, but by this stage, that's as good as giving anything new and fresh.

Depeche Mode Day 3 - Just Couldn't Get Enough

2009-03-03T14:44:00.000-08:00

Keith Richards. Jimmy Page. Nikki Sixx. Rock monoliths, the lot of them, with the common theme being that they were all one-man narcotic factories. Overdoses didn't stop them, and in the case of Motley Crue's Sixx, went home to overdose again after being released from the ER. Impressive, but let's be fair, twattish. Should such a pub conversation ever take place about these drugged-out rock Gods, the same names will always pop up. But not Dave Gahan's, mainly thanks to Depeche's outsider profile.

There was nothing special about Dave's drug use. It's more a case that it took a decade to get to it and then perfect immediately. The first ten years of Depeche featured regular, but restrained, casual drug use. It was only after 1990's landmark Violator album hit paydirt that it all hit the fan in many ways.

A quick recap: Following the Black Celebration tour, Depeche served up Music For the Masses in 1987, offering up a less claustrophobic affair that also widened their symphonic and rock scope. Only a bit, mind. It also resulted in a bigger world tour that saw them sell out California's Rosebowl Stadium, an event documented in their "101" live/album/vid/DVD/whatever, and something that no-one from Basildon had ever done before or ever will again. It was probably as good as it was going to get.

Except it didn't, because 1990 saw the release of the critically acclaimed Violator and a little incident in West Hollywood:

Insert "LA couldn't organise a signing in a record shop" joke here. Whether it was a riot is open to speculation, but it probably gave the Fuzz good practice for two years later. It also proves that Anericans can find 10 defferent ways of saying "Depeche".

So, Violator, then. Big album, big tour, bigger success. The only way to cope with all of this is to become a bona fide Rock Star, do lots of drugs or go a little bit nuts. Or all of the above if you fancy, with gallstones. It was probably bad luck that the everyman Rock Grunge scene kicked in just after, giving Gahan access to new tattoo ideas and a case-load of heroin. I blame it on the Janes Addiction PR girl becoming Gahan's second wife. What follows is a generalised transformation:

1981:

1990:

1993:

Granted, the latter photo doesn't give the impression of a heroin addict, but it's not the cherub from 1981 either. Either way, there are a couple of pix hidden here and there that give a better idea of Gahan's lifestyle at the time.

This makes 1993's Songs of Faith and Devotion a painful listen looking back. A great record that leapt a huge distance from previous efforts, it was a quasi-goth-rock-gospel-techno beast with Gahan entering into full Rock God status.

In Your Room, (Songs of Faith and Devotion, 1993)

By spring 1996, Gahan had become a complete Junkie, had all contents of his house nicked during a second stint in rehab, slashed his wrists on at least two known occasions, and had one major overdose that was only avoided thorugh a Nikki Sixx-friendly "Kickstart My Heart". This may sound all very normal in the field of rock excess, but it just seems bizarre and surreal when you consider they happily managed without it for a decade previously. As for the rest of the band, Martin Gore drunk too much but found it easy to quit. Andy Fletcher feel into depression and missed four months of a tour for a pleasant stay in hospital, while Alan Wilder got the aforemetioned gallstones. He then quit the band shortly after. Well, wouldn't you?

I'll come back to this little history at the end. Album reviews tomorrow - Yay!

Depeche Mode Week - Day 2: Peroxide and Bondage

2009-03-02T14:05:00.000-08:00

I've heard it said in the past that while the UK is focused on singles, the US market is more concerned with the full studio album. I have no idea why there should be a difference in mentality, but it seems true. The US will measure success over time on album sales, with singles as a pleasant addition. Perhaps us Brits just have a short attention span and can only focus on ooo, cool, new Wolverine Trailer! Brilliant.

So, where was I? Yup, The US market, which also gives a lot of oomph to the tours as well. Think of the big British groups that have had big US success. They normally are the ones that disappeared across the Atlantic for weeks on end and slogged it out. They don't appreciate people wandering over there and forcing a single down their throats without working for it, something you can get away with in the UK and only just in Europe. It's this thinking that explains Mode breaking the US a good seven years after Just Can't Get Enough.

OK, let's backtrack. It was all going fairly well in Blighty for Depeche. They survived after Vince Clarke's departure, roping in Alan Wilder to tour with them and eventually record as well. Martin Gore's songwriting improved over the next three albums, and the Top 10 got a few more hits. In addition, there was much experimental jiggery pokery with the advancing electonica thanks to a German industrial fetish, and a sudden cascade of Socialist jabber. A few examples while we're here:

See You, (A Broken Frame, 1982)

Aaaa, doesn't ickle Dave look cute in his little bow tie? Come back, leather bondage look, all is forgiven! Incidentally, It may be worth noting that wandering round Selfridges singing this doesn't result in the cashier drones spontaneously finding cool Moog sounds out their tills, and will more than likely result in your sharp upending through the front doors by a large man named Biff.

Everything Counts, (Construction Time Again, 1983)

In which Dave's voice breaks and they go to the beach via a really, really, really long flyover.

People are People, (Some Great Reward, 1984)

In stark contrast to the British Leyland factory, the sounds of machinery and drilling are backed up by people talking about how we should be nice and all that. Can't argue with the sentiment, but a bit too obvious even for me. Perhaps we should go for something more subtle from that album, like Master and Servant?

Ok, maybe not.

So that takes us to 1986, just after a quick "Best of" and a small break. It all culminated into the album "Black Celebration", or as it was cheekily referred to in the album's recent documentary, "The songs aren't good enough, there aren't any singles and it'll never get played on the radio".

Grossly unfair, but not surprising. Even considering Depeche's more quirky use of electronica than their peers, it still needed work on the listener's part. While the title track nodded towards the period's movie soundtracks from the likes of Tangerine Dream, the likes of It Doesn't Matter Two and Dressed in Black were stark, drum-less offerings of neoveau cabaret. As well as the magnificent Stripped (see later this week), we got A Question of Time, the boys first video with Anton Corbijn. More on him later:

Overall though, it felt like an album as a piece of art, as opposed to collections of songs like previous albums. It just all clicked, and remains a fantastic piece of work. Even with their fanbase, UK sales merely regarded it as a new Depeche album. On the continent and the US, though, it went further. Depeche's more punchy electro and lack of yacht-sinking stood them apart from their British new wave peers, and the alternative radio stations started to take notice. A lengthy US tour followed, and phase 2 started big style.

Depeche Mode Week - Day 1

2009-03-01T15:43:00.000-08:00

This is a bit of an experiment, I'll be honest. Not so much writing about the mighty Mode, but managing to do it every day for a week. Still, worth a go.

Yes, Depeche Mode, a band who, depite their longetivity, still seem to exist outside of the mainstream. The biggest cult band ever? Possibly, depending on your viewpoint of the word "cult". The fact remains, despite 28 years of pulsing dark electronic pop, iconic videos and a herculian drug intake from vocalist Dave Gahan, they are still just an 80s Pop group to most of the general public, at least to those who have heard of them. Just can't get Enough, their first big hit from 1981, and just before they'd hit their twenties, is still the only track most people could hum, a fact exacerbated by idiot DJs at horrific 80s chain clubs like "Reflex" who remain oblivious to the fact that they had plenty of other Top 10 hits in that decade, let alone after. As a result, I wouldn't be surprised if some folk think of them as "One Hit Wonders".

To be fair, though, this is probably due to the quality of the song. In pop terms, it is a classic, and probably songwriter Vince Clarke's best. A hook, a chorus, a simple catchy melody, all done in a Casio-friendly format that fitted right into it's time. You can't really hold anything against it. However, you can say whatever you like about the ickle leather Village People look. Be my guest.

Depeche Mode - Just can't get enough
Uploaded by bebepanda

It's because of the song's inherent POP-ness that I welcomed the news that new chart fitties The Saturdays would cover it for Comic Relief. Ok, I couldn't slag the news off as it's for charriteeee, but I could have been left unhappy by the end result. In the end, I'm not, mainly because it would be quite the achievement for any chart act to cock it up. I've heard better versions, certainly, but this is a respectable turn, as are the ladies in the video, homina homina. It keeps the original vibe, sounds good, fun and helps a few needy folk at the same time. Ok, I'll raise my hands - I like The Saturdays anyway, but I still would not want them touching any of Mode's later material. Not without a full vamp-out anyway.

Next: Why Depeche Mode are better than U2. No, really.

Incidentally, if you're reading this on my Facebook note stream, go to the original Blogspot as videos don't transfer over, it appears. Rubbish.

These boots were made for grooving.

2009-02-18T15:05:00.000-08:00

If more folk did this instead of going to the Nuremberg rallies...sorry, X-Factor auditions...the country would be in a better state. And I do genuinely do believe that.

Oh, Victoria....

29 years young...

2009-02-06T13:09:00.000-08:00

That's right. Another year bites the dust. Still, as I'm feeling less than creative right now and the need to rant is pretty minimal, I thought I'd just big up some top tracks that have collectively got my metaphorical musical mojo aflame. Ahem.

The Pipettes - Pull Shapes (We are the Pipettes. 2006)

Wonderfully delicious and delightful surf-pop girly harmonies coupled with the kind of pop-nous that makes you realise that Pop music, when done properly, can trump everything else in attaining the perfect high.

The Pipettes - Pull Shapes

Ladytron - International Dateline (Witching Hour, 2006)

A stripped back synth-bassline throbs underneath a starightforward drum loop and slowly creeps into the consiousness with menacing aplomb. Oh, dear, it's in your head already isn't it?

Ladytron - International Dateline

The Charlatans - Weirdo (Between 10th and 11th, 1992)

If you want to suvive Madchester and keep up the shindig well into Britpop then just play with the formula a bit. The heaviest Hammond Organ riff ever as an intro? Ok then.

The Charlatans - Weirdo

Municipal Waste - Lunch Hall Food Brawl (The Art of Partying, 2007)

The possible result of youthful 80s Thrashers being placed in stasis with a steady support of Thrash, weed, Thrash, zombie films and a bit of Thrash and being let loose in the new millenium with some updated music tech. Possibly.

Municipal Waste - Lunch Hall Food Brawl

The Saints - Know Your Product (Eternally Yours, 1978)

Not-quote-Punk Aussie Punksters with added doses of horns and groove. Never that big so you can big up these lost treasures and be all elitist-like.

The Saints - Know Your Product

'Bye Tony

2009-01-19T12:35:00.000-08:00

Tony Hart dies at 83

For British folk of my generation, Tony Hart was probably the first person we came across who made you want to draw and be arty. He was enthusiastic for his craft and he never spoke down to the younger folk who watched him with glee.

Morph was his plasticine creation, and this image I came up with seemed to be the most appropriate tribute.

Antacid Images

2009-01-13T15:06:00.000-08:00

d'oh!

Further proof that I am a complete numbskull - I finally get round to building my website and putting it up and I don't even take the opportunity to promote it wherever possible. Never mind the revolution being televised - I haven't even put my trainers on yet!

So here's a taster:

and here I am:

ANTACID IMAGES

The site gives an idea but it's a start.

And yes, I know I haven't done the "contact" bit yet. Bear with me.

Top Ten Albums of 2008

2008-12-14T15:32:00.000-08:00

Sod the turkey, mince pies and unoriginal dramatic plotline on Eastenders - Christmas is all about top 10 lists, and this is the only one I bother doing. Enjoy.

10) FREEZEPOP - Future Future Future Perfect (Rykodisc)

When a band announce on their sleeve that "no real instruments were used in the making of this recording", you probably know what to expect. Synths clash with more synths clash with some very pleasant nonchalant vocals from Liz Enthusiasm(!). The likes of Erasure and Dubstar are obvious reference points as the more lively likes of Ninja of Love and Brainpower sit alongside the sublime likes of Swimming Pool. It's a bit too whimsical at times, but you won't ever get a headache.

Check out: Less Talk More Rokk

9) CULT OF LUNA - Eternal Kingdom (Earache)

Concept album warning! Still here? Well, as this album is based lyrically and sonically on a diary written by some murdering loon, then the tag applies. Although between you and me, this album is nothing new for CoL. Their enveloping and sprawling dischordant wall of noise is executed as finely as ever and is not for the faint of heart. Eternal Kingdom also seems them creeping back into ther darker territory they had moved away from on the last two albums, whilst retaining that sense of restraint they had began to take charge of. The result: something that may well create a loon out of the listener if caution is not ensued.

Check out: Eternal Kingdom

8) ALPHABEAT - This is Alphabeat (Copenhagen)

Proof positive that "Pop " is not a dirty word, Alphabeat offer up the kind of classic sunshine pop that seems to have been missing from our charts for some time. Quintessentially Scandinavian, the Danish sextet offer up one infectious harmony after another. If its not the disco-rock of Fantastic Six or Boyfriend, its the throbbing synths on Touch Me Touching You and Rubber Boots. Like all sugar-infected pop music, this is not to be overdone at any one time, but to be consumed regularly as part of a balanced music diet.

Check out: Boyfriend

7) HADOUKEN! - Music for an Accelerated Culture (Atlantic)

Whilst we should discourage any attempt to stick "nu" before an established genre tag in order to regard any new sound, "nu-rave" is pretty darn appropriate for these young Brits. Energy? Pah, these guys belch it out in their sleep. Rave beats clash with casio bleeps, grimy raps and buzzing guitars to concoct a record so utterly now that it should be first into any time capsule. What's most pleasing is not just the ability to throw everything and the kitchen sink in to good effect, it's that pretty much all tracks are classic pop songs with a defining hook and chorus. Which means we get the catchy likes of Declaration of War and Driving to Nowhere as well as the more pulsating likes of Liquid Lives. Ah yes, there's also THAT Atari siren that kicks off That Boy That Girl.

Check out: Game Over

6) BLEEDING THROUGH - Declaration (Trustkill)

Reigning in producer-supremo Devin Townsend was an inspired idea that the Orange County bruticians should have come to earlier. Previous album The Truth wasn't bad, but it was too raw most of the time. Declaration makes up some ground and serves to honour the wondrous marriage of gothic keyboards and straightforward hardcore metal.
It also proves that they're not one-trick ponies as the full-on likes of the title track and Seller's Market stand nicely alongside the romantic grandeur of There was a Flood and Sister Charlatan.

Check out: Seller's Market

5) METALLICA - Death Magentic (Vertigo)

Honestly, even if it had just one impressive solo, Death Magnetic would have been held in higher regard than the much-maligned St Anger. The more cynical may suggest that the abundance of "classic" 'tallica, solos and thrashy riffs on DM is both an attempt to regain lost fans and take advantage of metal's current resurgance. Whatever. The more devoted Metallifan knows classic 'tallica when they hear it, and this is it. They've done it before, so this won't make any "all-time" list, but this is the boys doing what they love because they can. You can bang that head again now.

4) OPETH - Watershed (Roadrunner)

Let's face it, it's highly unlikely that Opeth could ever put a foot wrong. They've made a steady career of melding prog and folk with the most extreme of metal, and it would be foolhardy to suggest that anyone else comes close to touching them. The Swedes pick up where last album Ghost Reveries finishes but decide to ramp up the heavyness when applicable. This is the heaviest they have sounded for a few albums, but in contrast, their acoustic and prog moments are moreso too. It's hard work, but like anything that requires effort, it reaps its required rewards.

Check out: Heir Apparent

3) CANCER BATS - Hail Destroyer (Hassle)

If debut effort Birthing The Giant was the unpredicted bomb dropped square in the middle of rock's conciousness, then Hail Destroyer is surely the delayed explosion. The Canadians' vicious blend of Black Flag-inspired harcore and the kind of southern sludge metal that Down are renowned for doesn't just slay on Hail..., it tears apart, mutilates and then fucks the corpse for good measure. If the title track and Harem of Scorpions are perfect examples of savage melody mixed with rock violence, then Sorceress and Pray for Darkness are examples of what the pit was made for. The bonus here is that The Bats know how to balance things out. Bastard's Waltz and Lucifer's Rocking Chair buck and groove in a tight spot and just reinforce the rage that surrounds it. Epic Hail.

Check out: Regret

2) LADYHAWKE - Ladyhawke (Modular)

Is great music a result of experiencing life to the full or can it be a result of being a complete fanboy/girl? Whilst we can't accuse her of forfeiting the former, Ladyhawke's Myspace page proves that she could well knock those numpties on "Eggheads" into touch in any pop music round and still have five minutes to write two great songs. The reference points from the last 30 years are frequently obvious but when the songs are this great, who cares? New Zealander Hawke, real name Pip, has conjured up forty-odd minutes of the best kind of Pop music - saccharine-free tracks that stick in your head that you have no desire to get rid of. No instrument sounds over-used or over-produced at any time and Pip's dreamy vocals are utterly heartmelting. This is proof that only great pop music, and not the lure of fame and fortune, can inspire more great pop music. Best debut of the year, no question.

Check out: Magic

1) LADYTRON - Velocifero (Nettwerk)

For those Mods who know that a Velocifero is a type of scooter and are wondering if Ladytron have ditched the Moogs and Korgs and gone all Quadraphenia on us, it should also be noted that it can mean "bringer of speed". Not a reference to the local dealer, but appropriate nonetheless as Velocifero is one enormous high. Ladytron have somehow created an album so astounding that you may think they've plugged in their synths to the astral plane itself. Velocifero sounds more massive than any synth-based album has any right to. Black Cat and Burning Up throb and thrust, Ghosts and The Lovers completely reanimate the corpse of Glam Rock, Kletva and Versus remind you that there are no limits to using any music from around the world while Deep Blue is, quite simply, perfection.

With Velocifero, Ladytron haven't so much raised the bar for themselves and their peers, they've shot it into the stratosphere and out of sight to pick up some offworld elements on the way. They may as welll invest in some scooters and naff off to Brighton for a while because it's unlikely to see them surpassing this any time soon.

Check out: Deep Blue

He's not a work of art or anything...

2008-11-11T16:18:00.001-08:00

I'm once again indulging in a bit of nostalgic Britpop and came across this little bugger on last.fm. What's hugely worrying is that whilst I liked it, it was never a favourite song or band....

but I still remembered and mouthed pretty much every word as it was playing...

I want another shot at being 16 dammit. I'll do better this time, I swear.

Blame Davey

2008-10-13T11:59:00.000-07:00

If you think about, or debate, a certain event too much, you will eventually arrive at several origin points, with the earliest being The Big Bang/Genesis etc as they were the first things ever and the debated subject eventually came from that, along with everything else. Of course, this is ludicrous, but it's always fascinating to take a major aspect of any part of Pop Culture and find its birth. The death of one scene, the emergence of a wide-eyed new talent. The possibilities are endless. Sometimes, though, its something thats not obvious and you would never think about.

So, the Myspace generation. How did it happen and why did it happen the way it did? Was its success based on the emergence of this "emo" scene, or was it something that was destined. And why, oh why do I always come back to this particular album as a turning point?

A Fire Inside (AFI) were another scraggy young punk rock band from 90s California, all ripped clothes and dodgy haircuts. Fair play to them, but nowt overly special barring a bit of energy and the odd cool track title (I Wanna Get a Mohawk (But Mom Won't Let Me Get One)). It was pretty much law that US punk bands had to like old goth punks The Misfits to some positive degree, even if it only meant to play the odd cover at Halloween. AFI, however, had some sort of moonlight-induced epiphany and decided to fully embrace their inner Danzig in 1999, which resulted in Black Sails in the Sunset complete with even weirder track names (Malleus Maleficarum, Clove Smoke Catharsis). It also got them noticed a bit more and they enjoyed it so much they never washed off the make-up again. They followed Black Sails... up in 2000 with The Art of Drowning

Not surprisingly, with any local band made good, the local rockers took notice. Orange County started to sell more black nail varnish and rock bands of other genres started dabbling in the dark (music) arts. It was around the turn of the millenium that the likes of Avenged Sevenfold, Bleeding Through and Eighteen Visions also started to make a name for themselves. Suddenly, local kids who had nothing but sunshine and ska had something a bit new and fresh to enjoy, even if the rest of the world had seen it before. The OC was black, black, BLACK, like the rivers of hell through an eternal cordial blend of evil and sin, etc. By the time AFI released the next album in early 2003, Sing the Sorrow, California had a quite a large dark-hearted community. This whole thing was no doubt exacerbated by the rest of the world spunking over Linkin Park et al. Those scensters have got to be ahead of the pack, haven't they?

Then in October 2003, somthing else happened. Some bloke called Tom decided to take the best bits of Friendster and Yahoo and came up with a new way for men to stalk hot girls. Unsurprisingly, this California-based "Myspace" malarkey seemed a great thing to grab ahold of first by these local be-gothed whippersnappers, seeing as they retained a bit of good old-fashioned hardcore elitism - "We were there first!"... Granted, everyone was going to jump in, and did, but by that time, the dark horde had made their mark with their skinny black clothing, sideswept haricuts and mirrored photography. They did get there first, kids, don't forget it!

This, of course, was dynamite for any other bands who were starting to get somwhere in 2004 as they could take full advantage. The first to this cake was My Chemical Romance, and funnily enough, they became huge. I'm not sure who decided that "emo" was the right term though. That's a discussion I never want to enter.

The rest really is history. Of course, I could be talking out my backside as I've never been to California. But I did read the rock mags on a regular basis, and I picked things up, and all of this just seems to fit:

AFI Go goth,
the local kids then go goth,
the local metal and hardcore bands go a bit goth,
they all create their own communtiy and look,
they showcase their community on some cool new platform,
the everyone else joins in....

Not that I'm saying that the biggest pop cultural phenonemnon in modern history owes AFI a few royalties, but for me, this is quite an obvious path. What I'd be keen to see is if folk have a different timeline figured.

Breath Deeper, Daydreamer...

2008-07-10T14:22:00.000-07:00

If I take 24 years of listening to music, I would find it difficult to pinpoint many artists or songs that I liked at one point but now cannot stand. Coal Chamber is the only one that springs to mind, and maybe Limp Bizkit. Granted, that's always going to be the way with albums released. I'll either quickly go off a particular album or never like it in the first place while the rest of their catalogue remains prized. Korn is an example - I needed more cash for the Reading Festival grub fund - so their later albums were flogged. I didn't eat very much...

But overall, I've always dipped into that catalogue occasionally and got some pleasure from artists who have long passed me by in sound and scene. That casette copy of the London Boys' "Twelve Commandments of Dance" got some spins a while back, and in the midst of Stock, Aitken and Waterman's jizzlobbing on the late 80s charts, their dance pop sounds pretty good nearly 20 years on.

The same goes for those Britpop artists of the mid 90s. Though I never brought a great deal before Iron Maiden grabbed me, I've still kept most of it - although I'll come back to that later. But recently, I've been listening to a lot, Mainly through last.fm and anything I've downloaded on a whim. And I have to say, I'm getting a real kick out of it and I do think that some artists were as good as the music mags of the time suggested they were, even though they wouldn't admit to it now. And what has bought this nostalgia on? This:

Phonogram is not a comic book I ever expected ro read in my lifetime. Yes, there's plenty of subjects available, but Britpop was never on that list. Never would I have thought I would read about a central character who frequently extols his perceived virtues of Sunderland mob Kenickie.

The central idea of this book is that music is linked to a kind of magical plane, where scenes are as a result of Magical and God-like activity. The Goddess Britannia conjured up the 60s stuff before returning 30 years later. And now, she is being forcibly resurrected to help create another great British scene now with a load of crap artists. Kinda.

This is one of the most original things I've ever read...and also one of the most pretentious. But it needs to be, because you cannot think of that scene, or many others, without recalling that particular characteristic of music journalism. It needs to be told in an "up its arse" method to honour the subject matter. Which means like any great album, you'll need to read it several times. The Glossary itself is nearly worth the money alone. Thanks to all the references within the book, a back-pages reference guide is needed for those who struggle to remember some of the era's lesser players. And because of the story's present day settings, it ain't just Britpop that gets all the attention. Check the Glassary for Gillen and McKelvie's fantastically brutal entry for Razorlight.

Now, about those old records. I did chuck my Oasis CDs during a More-Metal-than-Thou point in my life. D'oh. But I have no problems with chucking out that Northern Uproar single...

Modern Times

2008-06-23T14:42:00.001-07:00

It's not uncommon that I joke about my age and the fact I seem to be getting old quickly. Yeah, I know, it's everyone.

But seriously, I really cannot keep up with things these days. It seems that there's some new fancy gadget or software every day that everyone else knows about except me. And while I can keep up with various PC basics, with everthing else, I just feel like this poor bloke more often than not...

You won't see that on the Tellybox! - Mooo!

2008-06-01T06:05:00.000-07:00

So, it's a quiet autumn evening. You're off to the Lamb and Flag for a couple of mild ales with Bob from down the road. It's a pleasantly mild evening so you detour across the field to enjoy the peace of it all.

You're discussing Leeds United not getting promoted this season when you walk over a hill and see a Zombie giving one to a cow.

What do you do?

Answers on a postcard.

Alternatively, you can check out Frank Cho's "Zombie King" here. He couldn't be bothered to continue the project but we'll let him off as he's Frank Cho.

Woo hoo!

2008-05-30T15:01:00.000-07:00

Fair to say overall, it's been a shit week. Not the worst, but rubbish is the general over-riding frame of mind by the end.

Monday saw a fairly inocuous trip to watch the new Indy flick hampered by bad weather and awful train delays everywhere. This ended up in me appearing to be on the only train moving anywhere at one point and having to arrive at a terminal destination a good mile walk from the cinema in order to guarantee getting there. And I did. After getting drenched and missing the planned viewing. Still, I saw it and got to be social even if the day felt a bit wasted.

Work? poo off. Nothing went right. Amd while I ended up doing everything that NEEDED to be done, I certainly didn't get everything done that I wanted to get done thanks to various programs buggering up and other factors getting in the way. Mail merge, anyone? Fuck off!

Electricity died on wednesday night. OK, this provided us with an excuse to spend the evening down the pub to watch a shit England match and play pool, as well as meet some new folk. But generally, offically rubbish.

Thursday - rubbish.

Today, well, I'm glad the months over, but I left the bar feeling rubbish. Mainly because of mates offering advice and opinions to me on things that they believe they know about (and maybe they do, from THEIR perspective), but that help not a jot because I'm not actually them, and I, as me, cannot legitemately apply their advice. Different strokes and all that.

I'm learning what works for me and it is getting me somewhere. Couple that with the British way of getting on with it and I'm making more progress than people think I am, but because of an established perception of character...Funnily enough, it's not me that brings this subject up as it's not a problem, but I end up having to get defensive and sound like I'm making excuses. Gee, thanks.

I'm more confident in certain regards than I've ever been. So don't bloody well shoot me down because you believe I'm going the wrong way about it. Have some faith.

Roll on June.

You won't see that on the tellybox! - Frank goes to the Zoo

2008-05-25T15:50:00.000-07:00

It's fair to say that I rarely see anything in films or on TV that surprise me. It may be a great story well written, but it is unlikely it will contain anything that truly makes me go "woah, nellie". Doctor Who could, but never does. Perhaps when Steven Moffat takes over as chief bloke it may, but that's in another couple of years.

I leave the surprises and shocks to the comic books. Even after the best part of 15 years serious reading, I still come across events that may or may not be intrinsic to the plot, but leave me utterly dumbfounded. I thought I'd share them with you. Viewers of a nervous disposition...probably shouldn't be reading this blog in the first place. You've got other things to worry about, I'm sure.

The Punisher likes his guns. He likes using his guns. A lot. Driven insane by the murder of his family, Frank Castle chooses to spend his friday and saturday nights blasting holes in any serious lawbreaker he can. And if he hasn't got a gun, he'll be using something else, especially if it's one of nature's natural killing machines. Have you ever felt threatened by some oik with a Staffy outside Woolies? No need, they're both pussies. There's far more hardcore out there as Marvel's Second Punisher volume #4 showed back in 2000.

On the run from Ma Gnucci's 'orrible lot, Frank sidesteps into the local Zoo and heads straight for the fishies. Piranah are fishies, and to be fair the following isn't the first time these toothy bastards get a hefty free meal:

Let's face it, Joe Dante got there first.

Still, piranhas and a subsequent man-sized boa are small fry, it's the polar bears you've got to worry about. What's that, you say? They kill for fun, of course they're a danger! Well, yes, you'd be right, which is why you wouldn't see this coming:

And, frankly, neither did the polar bear.

Still, here are some nice mobsters saying hello.

What's that, Mr Bear, you don't take kindly to being punched?

Frank has since attempted to replace the deceased Steve Rogers as Captain America.
America! Fuck, yeah!

Hurry up, Harry, come on!

2008-05-16T15:11:00.000-07:00

It's that time of year again. The morning when I get up at a reasonable hour (read: before 10 am), get my newspaper, have a lazy breakfast, and get whatever necessary chores/work done.

Then, sit back for the afternoon with lots of tea/ale (depending on energy levels) for the FA Cup Final and all it's pre-game entertainment. Well, I say entertainment. Its not exactly the Superbowl, and there aren't cheerleaders to ogle over. You may like Alan Hansen in that way, but I don't.

In case you're wondering, I won't be gunning for the underdog. Nothing against Cardiff or the Welsh, I like the Welsh. Not sure why, but hey ho. No it's Portsmouth for me as they've really worked at it the last few seasons and Harry Redknapp's managerial career deserves something a bit better than the Inter-bleeding-toto cup.

On the other hand, maybe Portsmouth shouldn't win. Last time they won, a World War kicked off...

Meet Fletcher, your new roommate...

2008-05-09T13:35:00.000-07:00

You're going to jail. No really. And you don't even know it.

And all cause of that bit of porn you've got on your pc or behind the copy of the Indiana Jones trilogy.

Surely not, you say? well, yes actually. and don't call me Shirley.

Explanations: Have you heard of the Criminal Justice and Immigration Bill? No? Well, bad luck because it's now an act. And it's not surprising you're clueless because it's received naff-all media coverage, for some reason.

It's clauses 62-65 you want to look at. Or 63-66 once they've finished dicking about with it. It's all about extreme pornography, necrophilia, rape etc, which on first listen sounds justified as those things are bad, right? well have a look here...

http://www.backlash-uk.org.uk/bill80428.html

You'll be excused for scratching your head as it's all a tad confusing. You're joe bloggs who talks normal, innit. Words of more than three syllables are effort and enunciation is probably an Aztec city. If you get the jist, you're probably thinking ..."this affects me, don't it?". Well, probably, you and at least 10 million British adults.

The history: Some bloke whose name doesn't deserve to be mentioned again killed a teacher 5 years back. He was a nutcase, like many in history. Except he liked necrophilia and asphyxia sites. So obviously, those inspired him. As a result, our wonderful Labour arseh...er, government....decided to effectively outlaw those sites and the images within, in the process chucking the owner of the image in the slammer for 3 years and signing the sex offender's register. Understandable with certain sexual interests, but with this lax law, they've effectively outlawed every website or image/video where the pornography and act is a tad more creative than missionary.

Note the bit about "threatening someone's life":

Whipping. - check. obviously, could mess up your joints that.
vampirism - check. draining blood is baaaad, mmkay.
bondage - uh huh. staying in one position can't be good for the arteries, can it?
spanking - well, spank in one place for a few times and you could cause a blood clot.

I may sound daft, but the non-specifics of the law is the problem. Where is the line drawn?
Ultimately, the thing that has seemingly gone out the window is the issue of consensuality.
Even stranger, you're pretty much allowed to do what you want with the Mrs/Mr, but you can't document it. Acted scenes are disallowed because of what they represent.

The consideration clause for BBFC rated films is laughable. The kind of nutcase they're trying to protect us from could easily, and legally, buy Hostel, Devils Rejects etc. a nd just watch the more unpleasant scenes to get his kicks. If he doesn't extract those scenes to his PC, he's fine. He still gets his evil jollies and may still do something horrific. It doesn't solve the problem. It just crimilises millions overnight.

Your art books, photography hardbacks, MY BLOODY COMIC BOOKS!! They're not rated in the UK, are they? They're straight from USA. My copies of Dogwitch or Empowered could cause me a problem regardless of wether I get my kicks from them or not as they're quite suggestive. And don't get me started on my metal collection. Thank goodness I'm not a Dimmu Borgir or Cannibal Corpse fan...

I don't want to know what you do. Enjoy it, just keep it to yourself. And yes, if you want the necessary inspiration made by folk who wanted to and enjoyed it, then you should. No, I don't understand why you want to be strung by your balls and had wax smothered on your nipples. Then again, I don't understand why you want to wear that Charlton Athletic shirt. It's your life, in your bedroom. Keep actual kids, animals and dead folk away and crack on.

Don't even get me started on the "protecting women" cobblers. We all know that women have the filthier minds and inclinations and men just want a quickie at half time.

It's part of the act now, but apparently doesn't kick in until January 2009. If you feel the law's a bit crap or feel anything you take an interest in makes you a criminal because of it, visit the site, speard the word, sign the petitions etc, because it could still be yanked out.

One things for certain, this does ensure I will NEVER vote Labour...

Quote of the day...

2008-05-03T17:12:00.000-07:00

week...month...year...whatever.

akarshshekhar of the last.fm site proclaimed...

"nothing can suck more than St Anger,not even a fuckin blackhole"

I have no idea why this made me laugh more than anything in recent memory, but there you go.

little things, people. little things.

I know nothing about security lighting...

2008-03-06T14:43:00.000-08:00

There seems to have been a bit of a kerfuffle in the lives of various hip Geek types across, well, the world, it would seem. Channel 4 sitcom SPACED has finally confirmed what I always regarded as inevitable and landed itself a USA remake at the hands of McG. This was never a question of if, but when, following the success of Shaun of the Dead and Hot Fuzz. Of course, the kerfuffle is naturally down to the Spaced fanbase screaming blue bloody murder at the damn heresy of it all. I'd like to say I'm the same, but I can't.

To put you uncertain types in the picture, Spaced ran for 2 series on C4 in 1999 and 2001. Geeky lad and lass pose as couple to rent a flat in North London. They have barmy mates, barmy adventures that fall totally within the realm of "possibly everyday" and it all gets done whilst nodding towards Evil Dead, The Matrix, Human Traffic and numerous other cult classics. The ultimate cult classic, if you will. Very British , but hugely accessible on a Global level for it. The first American I showed it to is now a devotee of all creators involved - Simon Pegg, Edgar Wright, Jessica Hynes and Nick Frost.

Naturally, everyone's got a bit steamed at the news of the remake, but to be fair, for the wrong reasons. It's been made known that the original creative folk have not been consulted, which doesn't surprise me. It's the same with comics. No one needed Alan Moore's permission to film V for Vendetta as DC held the rights. That's contracts for you: The creators get the fan love and creative name, the studios get the hard cash. A lot of people have protested at this, and quite right on that principle, but others were doing so beforehand because...

It's going to be crap.

Really? Since when? Because it's American? Because Pegg's not writing it?

We have no idea what it will be like. It could be God-awful or it could be the greatest thing ever and trumping every sitcom ever made. But hey ho, it's obviously going to be rubbish so on that same note, I won't be writing my comic book cos I'm probably ripping off a lot of comics beforehand and I can't write for toffee.

Or, I could give it a go and see what happens and if it's crap, fair enough.

Let's face it, it's more to do with folk's possessive love of something and the fact that anything new is going to expose it to the masses or taint it's memory with something they consider less than tasty. The classic attitude of "we had it first, let's keep it that way". That's up to you, but an American remake, crap or not, successful or not, will do absolutely nothing to change my love for Spaced, and anything that will directly or indirectly point folk in the direction of Pegg at al is a good thing.

Of course, there's a full-on geek petition now trying to stop it from happening. Safe to say I won't be signing it. Who the hell am I to say, "you can't do this" or "that's an insult". I didn't make it or pour my creative juices into it so I'm in no position to start making demands, which is what I'd be doing. The creative folk have that option and weren't consulted so it's all moot. If someone wants to sign it on that principle then fair play. However, if the studios aren't going to do the honourable thing and go to the original creators, are they really going to give a monkeys what a load of uppity geeks say?

I also saw some folk moaning that it was McG's presence pissing them off. What? the same McG behins The OC and Chuck and who seems to have helped nail two wonderfully loveable nerds in Seth Cohen and Chuck Bartowski. Moan all you want, that's a reassurance in my book.

How about this option: Let it happen, watch the pilot, rave about it, get them the figures and the thumbs up for a full series. Than let them pour their funds into it and then show your tr00 feelings then. That'll leave them a bit worse the wear. Unless of course, you do absolutely love it, in which case, enjoy it.

PS - I was one of those right at the beginning of Episode one when first shown. Just saying.

Only in Dreams

2008-02-28T15:28:00.000-08:00

Tonight, I scored quite possibly the greatest goal I will ever score.

Just outside the 12 yard box, just to the right of the nearest post, surrounded by 3 defenders, I took a chance and, with the outside of the boot, managed to curl the ball pinpoint into the far left corner.

I would say it's the goal of the month.

Alas, it was one-off shot from Mr Rooney in Pro Evo 5. Says it all, really.

In real life, I would have tripped over my own feet trying similar. Luckily, I can't do that right now as I'm sidelined with an ankle injury that was, at one stage, swollen bigger than Gibraltar.

Know your limits, people.

More cock, please!

2008-01-24T11:23:00.000-08:00

I had a rubbish upbringing.

Maybe even a bad one. At least, that's the conclusion I should really start to come towards. Alright, I was slightly sheltered. Maybe. Either way, I don't seem to be inclined to do the many things people do that seem to be the norm these days.

To elaborate. I'm not naive. I've always understood for many years that there are many rotters out there (I know, rotters, who says that anymore, eh?) As well as all the rubbish things peple can do, there's the one choice of cheating on your loved ones and generally causing a bit of heartache in the process. Remorse and guilt possibly included. Yep, it existed and bollocks to the perpetrators.

Alas, it seems to become evidently clear that these people are no longer in the minority, if they ever were. I was happy in the knowledge that I had known a couple of folk here and there who needed a good slap in those regards but now it seems to be everyone around me, good mates, included. Brilliant.

Some of this is down to gossip, other times, from their own mouths. The former is obviously suspect here and there, but the knowledge of the latter renders it more believable. And when someone announces they've been floating their wares elsewhere away from the other half as innocently as if they're asking if you want another pint, then I'm sorry to announce I'm at exasperation point.

When did this become the norm? When did it become totally ok to disregard everything good you have and risk it? No doubt the excuse of "they cheated too" or "I'm a bad person" may come up. Excuses, and rubbish ones at that. There's probably also the classic "everyone else is doing it".

Well, not quote. I'm not. And I never will. Many thanks to my parents for giving me a conscience, much appreciated. And were I in a relationship, I'd be too damn elated to want to cock it up. Or, up the cock elsewhere.

Maybe it's just arrogance and this need to take risks. I don't know, maybe it's pure selfishness and "bollocks to everyone". All I can say is, looking from the outside, I've what these acts result in, suicide being one of them.

So to clarify: If you cheat on a loved one/other half/spouse etc: You deserve a flogging and a repetitive stapling of genitalia. Whatever you're gender.

And yes, if you are a mate reading this and are currently indulging in the above, I already know about it. Sorry.

Running Up That Hill

2008-01-03T11:12:00.000-08:00

The most important thing about a new place to live is not the house/neighbours/localmicroclimate/crumpet, but of course, the pubs. Granted,when seeking new accomodation, it should really be a given to try out at least 20 local establishments (if there are that many) within walking distance beforehand to assist the decision. City folk-no excuse. And let's face it, if you're closer to the cowpat than you are the congestion charge, then pleasant locals are abound.

Whilst I am happily getting used to the idea I live in Earlswood and not Redhill (nuts to the postal address - Earlswood has more of an English ring to it), I have to remember that Redhill has many drinking places in it's immediate environs, most of which I've been warned about. Luckily, I have about 7 pubs within a ten minute walk from my gaff that does not require me to go into Redhill's dark and evil locality. Wonderful.

Any rightful drinker should try out these at haste, especially when one, The Joshua Tree, employs their housemate. Alas, no football and many golfers would have me running a mile.
The Old Chestnut is too local, if you get my drift, so that's out. The first one I tried is the Garibaldi, slightly up a hill towards the common. Off the beaten track (read: no pub crawlers). It's small and furthest away out of all of them, but hardly far. And already a result, Iwould say.

Football is a guarantee, especially if it's United. And even though there's a match on the tellybox once in a blue moon, it has a fairly respectable Crystal Palace contingent. Double wahey. Ok, the landlord's a Liverpool fan, but his general niceness excuses this slight misdemanour. And with camra-friendly beers, we have a winner.

Just need the internet, and I'm done.

And a housewarming threesome, possibly.

Albums of the Year and other jazz...

2007-12-13T11:01:00.000-08:00

Yep, that time of year. always fun I guess. And as usual, I guess I'll find an absolute gem from this year in 6 months time which missed the list. Typical. Anyway, in reverse order:

10: POISON THE WELL - Versions

A gap of four years, 2 less full time members and an apparent does of Country music, it seems. Ever heard raw, brutal riffage underpinned by a banjo? You have now. An unexpected, intense joy.

9: THE SOUNDS - Dying to Say this to you

Scandinavia does it again. Danceable pop rock magic coated with synths and sleek punky guitars, and beefed up with some sultry "up yours" vocals from the loevly Maja. Sureferosa's crown could be nabbed.

8: ARCADE FIRE - Neon Bible

A lesson on how to make sweeping subtle rock with a slight dose of the kitchen sink. Equally uplifting and melancholy, Neon Bible is many things, none of them bad.

7: SHINY TOY GUNS - We Are Pilots

Or Version 3, having been reproduced a couple of times. Leftovers from 2006, Shiny Toy Guns are that rare beast of pop groups: Anthemic and catchy and downright sleazy and filthy. If there's any justice, the Mrs would be easily seduced by those dark riffs and elctronic throbs.

6: DEVIL SOLD HIS SOUL - A Fragile Hope

It's not often that dark apocolyptical riffage can sometimes sound so uplifting, but it's more than evidence here. The youthful UK bunch drag a sound from the depths of hell and light it with a heavenly fire. It rages and envelopes the soul and you may cry with joy.

5. BETWEEN THE BURIED AND ME - Colors

Here's another bunch who love that kitchen sink, but love brutal old skool metal riffage. Grunts and growls collide with blastbeats, jazzy interludes and the occasional acordian. Plus, this is downright accessible.

4. MUNICIPAL WASTE - The Art of Partying

Like Zombies? Beer? Dirty, fast slammin, frash metal? No? You will now. Fun is on the cards in this Wasteland, and no one escapes the food brawl. Or the beer pressure, or the general party-til-you-puke headbanging frenzy. Lighten up, you boring bastard.

3. PORCUPINE TREE - Fear of Blank Planet

The geek will inherit the eart. Especially if some downright scary riffs can be put to beautiful melodies and soaring vocals. Not to forget the ambient touches and intricate drumming. Did we also forget musicianship?

2. BIFFY CLYRO - Puzzle

Rock. It's good, and you know it. And this is good, very good. Catch, anthemic, and just so easy. Puzzle just oozes simplicity, as well as a canny knack to give it some welly as much as just caress those guitars. Melody is wasted these days, and Puzzle makes up for it

1. JIMMY EAT WORLD - Chase This Light

There was a time where emo was not used without outside of "emocore" and Jimmy were Kings. To be fair, they still are. Chase This Light should be a friendsly addition to a wondrous back catalogue that oozed love, despair, pain, anger and all that other human stuff. On evidence of this, they're happy, really happy, and combined with the powerful rock of their past, it's a majestic comeback. This is the kind of album you truly fall in love with, the kind where life is good and nothing can change your mind. The fact it's the top of this list unexpectedly roves that.

alllllo, Daaaaave...

2007-12-08T01:13:00.000-08:00

It's interesting what a handful of miles and a rich area does to differentiate towns.

Epsom: practically Sarf Lahndahn, innit, students, foreigners, more students, pretentiousness, etc.

Redhill: old people, bored people, boarded up pubs, new developments that will be lived in by people who will actually hate the town but gloat about their accommodation's conevenience....

actually, that last bit could be me. but to be fair, it's not as bad as I remember. Whilst I didn't grow up in posho Reigate exactly, (I hailed from the supremely middle-lower class enviorons of Wood'atch, awright), there was still a noticable difference between the Gate and the Hill. You felt safe in Reigate, you wanted to pack heat in Redhill. As it is, it's just a town like any other. Which is a shame. I would've liked to have witnessed at least one gunfight in a tearoom this week.

Anyways, still updating my net duties down the library. got up early on a saturday morning purely to do so, thus getting the shopping done promptly too. may actually get to watch Footy Focus at this rate.

even with all the xmas shenanigans upcoming, it will still be fairly chilled compared to the last mental month. I'm all settled, no house worries, my ace new computers up and running, albeit without sound, my new housmate's cool, so yes. all good.

not a bad week either. no sooner had I settled in thean I was straight up to Northampton on a coach to see my old housemate's new house (her own, damn her!) and support my mate's band debut gig supporting theSTART. wonderful, wait 6 years for a band to tour over here, then I see them twice with the added bonus of a hyper mate playing beneath them. Shame bugger all turned up, useless apathetic non-London folk. still, impromptu roadie duties allowed me to say hi to main act, which was nice as singer Aimee has permeated my dreams since I was 17....use your loaf. so yes, even after a bit of maturity and the ability to hold back and just have a normal conversation with these band types I like, I still fall into shy fanboy mode when I meet certain ones. Her hug when I said her last band was my first gig didn't do my nerves any favours...

Where's the blinking scissors?

2007-12-01T03:24:00.000-08:00

So, I'm in. new gaff in Redhill. not as bad as I remember, so long as I don't venture into town at night.

no net at the house, but should sort that out sharpish.

I'm surrounded by boxes and cursing my decision not to blow my hard-earned cash on ale and hookers every weekend, and instead partake in pastimes that require holding on to stuff. Damn you, Stan Lee!

Still, moving in day was fund and not stressful at all. and no that wasn't sarcasm.

right, Sinsburys. wish me luck!

Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes, innit.

2007-11-21T14:48:00.000-08:00

As I recover from what was a pitifully rubbish football day, although my under-achieving 5-a-side bunch (admit it, Penfold, we are!) could give England a lesson methinks, I look to the future, and look back at what was probably a disappointing year at the bungalow domestically. Ok, the near-constant rain didn't help, but numerous other factors just seem to be too obvious in their non-occurances. Oh, and there is the question of company, which I'll get back to when I'm settled in the new gaff.

Ah, yes, the new gaff, resplendant in it's Victorian brownstone glory in the shadow of two ruddy great gas towers. Kidding, aside, nice place, bigt double room and a relaxed landlord who would rather just keep Estate Agents out of the mix. (I think I'm in love). Yup, don't get us started on those bastard swines of whores.

The new gaff, as it shall forever be known with all it's symbolic awesomeness, will see my physog next week and hopefully the 'net by Christmas. And, yay, an allegedly wonderful chippy lies within 10 minutes walk.

Until then, there will be a week of tidying, boxing, goodbyes, good riddances, and tea brewed via saucepans. How Marxist.

So yes, I will do my best to update goings on here but intermittently possibly. If all goes according to plan , I may have had my way with an LA-based rockstar I've fancied since I was 17. And when I say my way, I mean a peck on the cheek and a photo with bad light. Ahem.

Wasted Opportunity

2007-11-04T14:19:00.000-08:00

I've just done my first big virus scan for way too long. Yep, I know, but surely the point of having virus-killer and super-router is to keep them out in the first place.

Anyways, one big scan later and I find out I had a minor Trojan Horse hidden away...for a few months. It's ok, it's gone now.

Not once during that time was my bank account hacked, my paypal abused or swedish porn kindly ordered on my behalf on my online shop accounts. And all my e-mails fine.

Now, what is the point of sneaking into my house and not nicking anything?

Amateurs.

Every day is like Sunday.

2007-10-28T17:15:00.000-07:00

Sod it, let's keep it simple. It's not as if there's a rulebook on how to start your first blog. If there is, then nuts to it anyway. It's probably a load of geek-pretentious old twaddle.

The weather.

Groan

Come on, fair's fair. You have to agree. A thoroughly moist summer followed by an nice autum is always a bit rubbish, especially when that autumn gets even nicer briefly when my mate from the OC flies back home after 6 months having missed a scorher. Of course, it's still a scorcher there, albeit a life-threatening one, but not in her region, thank the Lord.

But does it continue over here? nuh-uh. You can blame me for that as I have been off work. Halfway through a fortnight off, a fortnight where I should have been joining our Californian cousins were it not for the announcement that we have to shift out of our digs in a month. Four times in as many years, and still that elusive mortgage gets pulled further from my grasp. Pah. Keep your middle-class stability, thank you very much. "prayforacrashprayforacrash..."

So no work again this week, but trying to divide my time between having a clear out and getting some illustration done. The first week was a bit useless in those terms. Plenty of sleep though. Sleep is good.